Two Of A Kind
by ReganX
Summary: A Hole In The World' ended a little differently. Wesley and the gang have two big - figuratively speaking - problems to deal with. Complete.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive.   
  
**__**

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there.****_

**_Requirements:  
_**_The evil one must have blue hair.  
Harmony must make an appearance in the fic.  
Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

**Author's Note: **The first part of my story (in italics) is taken directly from the end of the episode 'A Hole In The World.' I haven't actually seen the episode yet, so my interpretation of the transcript - taken from BuffyWorld.com - may be a little off.****

**Author's Note II: **I don't know what kind of abilities Drogyn really has, but as of now they include teleportation.

Words in / / = Thoughts.****

**Prologue.**__

_"Will you kiss me?"_

_It was the question he had been longing to hear in the nearly three years he had known her. Wesley leaned forward and kissed her, gently at first, then more passionately._

_"Would you have loved me?"_

_"I've loved you since I've known you. No, that's not-I think maybe even before."_

_"I'm so sorry."_

_"No, no, no."_

_He couldn't lose her. Not now!_

_"I need you to talk to my parents. They have to know I wasn't scared, that it was quick. That I wasn't scared." Her slender body convulsed with the force of her coughing. "Oh God!"_

_He grabbed her shoulders, looking into her eyes, willing her to live, wishing that he could be the one suffering in her place._

_"You have to fight. You don't have to talk, just concentrate on fighting. Just hold on." _

_Her body trembled as she looked into his eyes._

_"I'm not scared. I'm not scared. I'm not scared." Her chant couldn't fool either of them. Her grip on his shoulders softened as the strength ebbed from her body. "Please, Wesley, why can't I stay?" Her appeal was that of a child, a lost little girl. _

_Wesley clutched her limp body in his arms. "Please . . . Please . . ." He didn't know who he was praying to._

_/Don't take her away from me! /_

_He watched in horror as the woman he loved went into convulsions, her body wracked by the force of the tremours . . . . . _

_* * *_

"Where's my mommy? I want my mommy!"

"This will not do! This is not what should have happened."

"I wanna go home!"

The two little girls, one frightened, the other incredibly pissed off, looked up at the astonished former Watcher, identical expressions of confusion on their small faces.

"What's going on?" The little brunette whimpered. "Why am I here?"

Wesley would have known her identity even if her hadn't witnessed the transformation.

"It's alright, Fred." He tried to sound reassuring, despite the fact that he was ready to scream in frustration. _/Why her! /_

The little girl narrowed her eyes suspiciously, backing away from him. "How do you know my name?" She gestured towards the other little girl, her mirror image, save for the bright blue eyes and the streaks of blue in her hair. "Who's she? What's going on?"

Before Wesley could come up with an appropriate response to any of her questions, the second child turned on him, her unnaturally blue eyes sparkling with rage.

"You!" Her small face was contorted in fury. "What have you done?"__

_/That's what I'd like to know! /_

_* * *****_

**_Deeper Well, England, Same Time._**

Drogyn recoiled as though he had been hit in the gut by a sledgehammer.

"Well?" Angel demanded impatiently. "Did it work? Were you able to pull that thing out of her?"

Gasping for breath, still reeling from the effects of his spell, Drogyn took a few moments to compose himself before answering.

Those moments were too long for Angel.

Grasping the other man by the collar he shook him as a dog would a rat. "Did it work?" The tension in his voice resonated throughout the cave. "Did you get Illyria out of my friend?"

"I was blocked." Drogyn choked out. "I couldn't . . ."

"So is Fred alright?" Spike clung to the faint shred of hope. "Or did it . . .?"

"Yes."

"Yes to what?" Angel was less than a hairsbreadth away from ripping the man's arms off and beating him to death with them.

A faint smile appeared on the keeper's face. "Both."

Before either of the vampires could respond, the keeper muttered an incantation, causing the two vampires to disappear in a whirl of glowing blue light.

* * ***__**

**_Thirty seconds later, Fred's apartment._**

"What the . . .?" A disoriented Spike shook his head, trying to shake his post-teleportation nausea. "Bloody travel sickness!" He grumbled, to nobody in particular.

"Wesley?" Angel caught sight of the less than happy looking former Watcher. "What's going on? Is Fred. . .?"

"See for yourself." Wesley, a grim smile on his face, moved aside to reveal the two little girls standing behind him. "I think," He said wryly. "That it would be fair to say that we have a problem."

TBC.

_Author's Note: I know, it's very short, but bear with me. This is just the prologue. As always, reviews and suggestions are quite welcome._


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive. 

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:_**

_The evil one must have blue hair._

_Harmony must make an appearance in the fic._

_Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

**Author's Note: **I'd like to thank everyone who reviewed the first part of this story. I had hoped to get this chapter up sooner, but I've been pretty busy lately.

**Author's Note II: **To Spana - I completely agree with you. I was devastated when I heard that Fred was more or less gone, especially since she and Wesley had only just got together. It was so unfair! That's why I took this challenge. That and I've never read a Fred-kidfic before. (If anyone knows of one, please tell me)

**Author's Note III: **I'm not one hundred percent sure what abilities Illyria (the adult version) possesses. I _think_ that she's invulnerable to weapons. If I'm wrong, please let me know. 

Words in / / = Thoughts.

**Chapter 1.**

"You can bloody well say that again!" Spike regarded the two little girls apprehensively. "What are we supposed to with them now?"

"What has happened here?" Illyria's eyes blazed with fury. "Where is my Qwa'ha Xhan? I cannot sense my Qwa'ha Xhan?"

"Your who?" Even Wesley, the one with the most knowledge of Illyria, was completely unfamiliar with the term. 

"I want my Qwa'ha Xhan!" Illyria stamped her foot in a very ungodlike manner. "I don't want to be in this body! Fix me! Now!"

Spike, despite the seriousness of their predicament, couldn't resist letting out a brief snort of laughter. "Not very intimidating in that outfit, pet."

Ignoring the blond vampire, Illyria glared up at Wesley. "You did something." Her tone was cold and accusatory. "You are the reason that I am trapped in this . . ." She scowled down at her small hands. " . . . Infantile shell."

"Hey!" Little Fred balked, offended by this perceived insult to her person. "I'm not a baby. I'm four!" She bit her lower lip, her eyes filling with tears. "I want to go home."

Angel crouched down in front of her, feeling decidedly uncomfortable. "It's alright." He tried to sound reassuring. "We're your friends, Fred, you can trust us, I promise."

"Nuh-uh." Fred backed away from him "Mommy and Daddy told me never to trust strangers. Not even if they give you candy or toys or anything." She added solemnly, destroying any hope the adults might have entertained of bribing her to cooperate.

Illyria regarded her counterpart with a scornful expression. "Human sorrow." She wrinkled her little nose in distaste." It's like offal in my mouth."

"That's enough!" Wesley snapped, glaring at the little blue-haired goddess. "Listen to me, Fred," He knelt down in front of her. "Everything's okay, I promise." He looked over at little Illyria. "We just need you both to come with us so that we can figure out what's happening."

The miniature goddess took a moment to weigh her distaste for humans against her desire for answers and nodded slowly. "I will come with you." She consented, as though it was a great condescension on her part. "But I will want answers soon." She added, raising a warning finger.

"Fine." Wesley turned to Fred, holding out his hand.

The little girl shook her head firmly. "No."

"Your parents told me to tell you that it's okay." He tried. "They want us to take care of you for a while."

Fred stuck out her lower lip stubbornly. "Prove it." She challenged.

_/Prove it? How the Devil am I supposed to . . . / _"Hang on." Wesley took out his cellphone and moved into another room for a couple of minutes before emerging, holding the phone out to Fred. "Here."

She took the phone warily. "Hello?" Her face brightened. "Hi, Mommy. Where are you? Where's Daddy? Who are these people? Are they kidnappers?" There was a pause as her questions were answered. "Are you sure?" Another pause. "Okay. Bye Mommy. Love you." She handed the phone back to Wesley. "Mommy said that you guys are good and not kidnappers." She announced cheerfully. "She said to go with you guys."

Wesley sighed in relief. He hadn't been sure if it would work. "You girls go down to the car with Spike." He instructed. "We'll be down in a bit."

Angel waited until the two little girls, together with a very unhappy Spike, had left the apartment before turning to Wesley. "What did you tell Trish?" He asked in a low voice, knowing how protective Mr and Mrs Burkle were of their only child. "Will she and Roger be coming down from Texas?"

Wesley shook his head. "That wasn't Trish." He told his friend regretfully. He had hated lying to Fred, whatever her age. 

"Then who . . .?" 

"A sorcerer from the Magical Department. A simple vocal glamour." Wesley sighed. "I had to get her to trust us and I didn't want to drag her parents into this mess." He defended, though Angel hadn't challenged him.

_/Who are you trying to convince, Wes? / _His inner voice chided him._ /Angel - or yourself? /_

* * *

**_An hour later, Practical Science Department._**

"So what do we know so far?" Gunn asked, joining Angel, Wesley and Spike in Fred's lab, where they were watching the Practical Science team - bar Knox who was being detained by Security - were running a series of tests on Fred and Illyria. 

To say that Gunn had been surprised to see his three colleagues walking into the building with the two little girls in tow would have qualified as the understatement of the millennium.

Charles Gunn had spent the last fourteen years fighting demons and vampires and this definitely ranked as one of the strangest things he had ever seen.

"So far, we know that there is not so much as a fraction of a difference in their height and weight and that their fingerprints are an exact match." Wesley sighed impatiently. "Which means that our highly qualified and over-paid science experts have been able to tell us that they're identical. Which we knew."

"They're running blood tests now.' Angel volunteered. "To see if they can learn anything useful from them and maybe figure out how to reverse this." He looked over to where the two girls were sitting side by side on the examination table, various members of the science team bustling around them. "It doesn't seem to be working out as planned." He commented dryly.

The lab tech tending to Illyria seemed to be growing more frustrated by the minute as he attempted to take a blood sample from the small deity – not an easy task when her skin was invulnerable to weapons of any kind.

A small pile of bent needles had accumulated before the lab tech finally admitted defeat and turned his attention to Fred.

The four year old shut her eyes tightly as the lab tech took her trembling hand, poising the needle above her inner arm.

Wesley came running at the first cry, scooping the little girl up and cradling her in his arms as he tried to staunch the blood flow.

"I'm so sorry!" The lab tech was devastated. "I must have hit a vein! Oh God, I'm . . ."

A piercing shriek of pain tore through the lab, practically shattering the eardrums of everyone in the room.

Illyria, her blue eyes wide and fearful, stared down at her own arm in confusion, gingerly touching the red liquid flowing from it with the index finger of her other hand.

"Blood." Her voice was filled with awe. When she looked up at Wesley and the tech, her expression had lost some of her customary arrogance, replaced by a tinge of fear. "Why am I bleeding?"

TBC.

_I've managed to update three stories in two days. A personal best._

_Please review, let me know what you think and if there's anything anyone would like to see._


	3. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive. 

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:  
_**_The evil one must have blue hair.  
Harmony must make an appearance in the fic.  
Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

**Dedication: **I'd like to dedicate this chapter to my new beta, Botticelli's Venus.

**Author's Note: **To gidgetgirl – Thanks for the taco tip. Don't worry, the longer Illyria is in little girl form, the more childlike she will become.

Words in / / = Thoughts.****

**Chapter 2.__**

**_Half an hour later, Angel's Office_**__

"Man, this place must be the grandmother of all rumour mills!" Lorne, in one of his typically colourful ensembles, strode into Angel's office where the rest of the gang were waiting. "So far, I've talked to at least twenty different people and I've heard twenty different versions of what happened. So what 's the . . .?" He trailed off as he caught sight of the two little girls. "Oh."

"That's about accurate." Wesley commented dryly.

Little Fred, who had been sitting on the couch next to her counterpart while Illyria studied the small red dot on her arm, a reminder of her first experience of bleeding, fascinated, slipped over to where Wesley stood, tugging on his shirt, her brown eyes wide with fright.

"He's a monster!" Wesley could barely hear her hissed whisper. "Is he going to hurt us?" She ducked behind the former Watcher as a rather hurt Lorne looked over at her.

Wesley patted her head, giving her a reassuring smile. "This is Lorne. He's our friend. He's not going to hurt you."

She peeked out shyly from behind Wesley's leg. "Why is he green? Is he an alien?"

"Lorne's uh . . ." Wesley racked his brains, trying to think of an appropriate cover story, one that would satisfy the four year old without completely traumatizing her. "Lorne's a goblin." He announced at last, ignoring the amused looks Lorne, Angel and Gunn were exchanging. "A _good _goblin." _/Thank heaven for fairytales! / _"You see," he soldiered on with his story, making full use of the fairytale angle to answer her previous questions. "Someone cast a magic spell that brought you here to us and made another little girl that looked like you." He nodded towards little Illyria.

"But she's not me, is she?" Fred interrupted, wanting to clarify that point.

"No, of course not." Wesley assured her. "You just look alike. My friends and I are going to try to undo the spell, but until then, you have to stay with us, okay?"

Out of the corner of his eye, Wesley saw Illyria roll her eyes, clearly not one whit impressed by his rather lame cover story, but to his relief, she made no attempt to contradict him.

Little Fred, devotee of fairytales that she was, accepted his story without a murmur, offering Lorne a shy smile before trotting back to the couch and the comic Harmony had donated.

Illyria sat next to her, staring off into space.

Wesley did not want to know what was going through her mind.

"So, what are we supposed to do with them now?" Angel asked, keeping his voice low as he and his friends moved away from the two girls.

"Doublemint commercial?" Lorne threw up his hands in a gesture of mock surrender. "Kidding."

"This is no laughing matter." Wesley's tone was snappish. "This is serious!"

"Face it, guys," Gunn sounded glum. "You could fit our combined knowledge of taking care of little girls on the head of a pin and we know even less about raising little goddesses."

"We don't have any clothes for them, we don't have any toys, we don't have a room to put them in." Angel ticked the items off on his fingers. "I don't even know what to feed them – what do little girls eat anyway?"

Despite the seriousness of the situation, Gunn couldn't keep from laughing at that question. "Come on, man, this is _Fred _we're talking about – just order in some tacos."

Lorne regarded the two small figures on the couch warily. "They _are _housebroken, right?" Human children were not one of his specialities.

"She's not a puppy!" Wesley snapped, irritated. "You are talking about one of our closest friends!"

Lorne laid a gentle hand on Wesley's shoulder, his expression one of sympathy and understanding. "We'll get her back, champ." He gave his friends a small smile. "In the mean time, how bad can these two be?"__

* * *

_An hour and a half later._

The Angel Investigations team had learned a valuable lesson.

Large tacos in small hands were _not _the best idea, especially when one pair of hands was completely unaccustomed to eating. 

The area around the two children was thoroughly littered with shards of lettuce, scraps of meat and globules of spicy sauce.

Angel visibly winced every time another dollop of food landed on his previously clean carpet.

The cleaners would _not _be happy when they came in the following morning.

Fred and Illyria, needless to say, were not in any better a condition than their surroundings.

Their hands, faces, matching yellow sundresses and even their hair were all liberally coated in the parts of their meal that hadn't quite made it to their mouths.

Illyria had added the final touch to the mess by spilling her drink, flooding Angel's conference table in a river of cherry cola.

Angel glared over at Lorne. "'How much trouble can they be?'" He scowled. "I hate you sometimes."

The small blue haired deity, looking less than divine in the remains of her meal, took a napkin and dabbed futilely at her sundress, giving up in disgust when her cleaning attempts were met with a total lack of success.

She yawned widely, frowning at the new sensation. "What is happening?" Since awakening in her human form, she had been prey to a wide variety of new sensations and she wasn't sure if she enjoyed any of them.

"You're tired." Fred told her knowledgeably. "It's probably past your bedtime."

Illyria drew herself up to her full height. "I do not have a bedtime." She announced in a dignified tone.

"Lucky!" Fred whispered enviously.

"Bedtime sounds good." Angel interrupted hastily, wanting to get the two girls packed off to bed before they could do any more damage. _/I knew that Illyria would be a handful but **Fred **. . . /_

"Uh, I think that we'll need to clean them up some before we do anything." Spike pointed out logically.

The five men exchanged an uncomfortable look, none of them thinking it appropriate for them to undertake the task of bathing the two girls.

After a few moments, Angel finally broke the silence.

"HARMONY!"

* * *

_Twenty minutes later, Angel's suite._

"I am so asking for a raise." Harmony grumbled as she rinsed the shampoo suds out of little Fred's hair, being careful not to splash her eyes. "This was _not_ in my job description."

The blonde vampire's pink top was already wringing wet and she had made the colossal error of bathing the two little girls together, meaning that Angel's bathroom was flooded by their combined splashing.

"Okay," She lifted Fred out of the tub and dried her off before tackling her long brown curls with a comb, being as gentle as she could.

"It hurts!" Fred wailed tearfully as Harmony teased out the tangles.

"Beauty is pain." Harmony told her, setting down the comb and starting to wind the four year old's hair into a long braid. "There." She released the young girl as soon as she was done. "That wasn't so bad, was it?"

Little Fred did not even dignify that with a response.

Sighing deeply, feeling as though she was the most tortured vampire in existence, harmony turned her attention to Illyria, eyeing the blue streaks in the little goddess's hair doubtfully.

"Maybe I should dye it." She mused aloud. "That way you'll fit in better."

"No need." Illyria smiled devilishly as her head was enveloped in an ethereal glow.

Little Fred's eyes were wide with admiration. "That is so cool!"

* * *

_Fifteen minutes later, Angel's office._

"You owe me." Harmony announced, stepping into Angel's office, holding the two little girls by the hand. "Big time."

"Thanks." Angel shot her a grateful look.

"We appreciate it." Wesley added sincerely.

"They wanted to say goodnight." Harmony told the assembled men, nodding towards the little girls, whom she had dressed in long black T-shirts purloined from Angel's wardrobe. "At least," She amended. "Fred did."

Wesley's smile faltered as he looked down at the girls.

Two little brunettes, identical down to the hairs on their heads, grinned back up at him.

"Isn't it cool!" Harmony enthused. "Illyria did it."

Wesley barely suppressed a groan.

_/Great! / _He thought unhappily. _/How are we supposed to take care of them if we don't know which is which? /_

TBC.


	4. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive. 

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:  
_**_The evil one must have blue hair.  
Harmony must make an appearance in the fic.  
Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

Words in / / = Thoughts.

Chapter 3. 

"Goodnight." Wesley bent down to plant a kiss on little Fred's cheek. "Sweet dreams." He stood, tucking the covers more closely around her. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Night night, Wesley." Little Fred was already half asleep.

Wesley fussed with the night light for a moment, reluctant to leave her side. "If you need anything, just let one of these gentlemen know." He nodded in the direction of the two security guards posted outside the room. "They'll come and get me."

"Okay." Fred could barely keep her eyes open. She curled up under the covers and popped her thumb into her mouth, drifting off to sleep.

Wesley, not wanting to disturb her, crept out of the room as silently as possible and headed for the elevator, but not before warning the security guards, in no uncertain terms, to protect their small charge with their lives.

* * *

**_Angel's office._**

"Girls asleep?" Angel looked up as the former Watcher entered his office.

"Fred is." Wesley sank down in one of the chairs. "I thought it prudent to separate her from Illyria whenever we cannot be there to supervise them, at least until we know more about what is happening."

"Probably a good idea." Angel conceded. "Where did you put them?"

"Fred is in the guest suite nearest to your apartment, Illyria is in the suite at the far end of the hall." Wesley informed him. "Security will be monitoring them. Where's Knox?" he scowled at the thought of the man behind Fred's suffering and transformation.

"He's being held in a containment cell." Angel answered grimly. "I want to find out everything that he knows about this Illyria."

"I suppose that he is this Qwa'ha Xhan that Illyria was going on about." Wesley mused aloud. "She was vexed that she couldn't sense him. It's strange, aside from her invulnerability and her shape shifting abilities, Illyria hasn't exhibited any signs of any of the abilities the books credit her with. I wonder why."

"Maybe her powers will grow when she does." Angel suggested.

"You believe that Fred and Illyria will age?"

The dark haired vampire shuddered at the thought of caring for a pair of four year olds for all eternity. "I hope so!" He exclaimed feelingly.

"Until the girls are restored, we shall have to make arrangements for their care." Wesley remarked. "Have you any idea on the subject?"

Angel shrugged. "I guess we can take turns watching them, try to keep them out of trouble." The mere thought of caring for a child filled Angel with trepidation. 

The only children that he had had any long term contact with during the course of his long life were Connor, who had been kidnapped as an infant and raised in a hell dimension and his sister Kathy, who had tasted a lot like chicken.

Suffice to say, his track record left a great deal to be desired.

"On a more positive note," Angel made a determined effort to sound cheerful. "We don't have to worry about our supply problem. I asked Harmony to do some shopping and pick up the things we'll need."

Wesley raised an eyebrow. "You gave Harmony access to the company credit cards?" Angel nodded. "Yeah, I figured she'd know more about what to get that I would."

Wesley shook his head pityingly. "You do realise that the woman is going to bankrupt us?"

* * *

**_Eight o'clock the next morning, Angel's office._**

"HARMONY!"

The blonde vampire hurried into Angel's office as quickly as her pink platforms allowed her to.

"Yes, bossy?"

Angel gestured to inventory detailing the final total cost of last night's shopping spree. "What's this?"

"It's the bill from last night." Harmony didn't know where this was going. "And you're welcome."

Angel stabbed the bill with his finger. "There's at least two too many zeros on this! What exactly did you buy?"

Harmony beamed. "They just delivered the packages."

Angel followed his secretary into the lobby, where the fruits of her shopping spree were laid out for all the world to see.

It took a few minutes for him to recover his powers of speech.

"Harmony," His voice was low and dangerous. "Exactly how many kids did you think you were shopping for?"

* * ***__**

**_Fifteen minutes later, Fred's room._**

Wesley laid out a selection of the outfits Harmony had bought and stood back, letting Fred decide which one she wanted to wear.

The four year old studied the outfits intently before pointing to a pale blue dress, embroidered on the hem with a darker blue. 

"That one." She announced decisively.

"Good." Wesley smiled at her. "Can you manage by yourself?"

"Of course." Her tone let him know that she was offended by his doubts.

"Alright." Wesley headed out of the room to give her some privacy. "Let me know if you have any trouble."

Once he stepped into the hall, he was confronted by a decidedly bizarre sight.

Illyria – at least, he thought that it was Illyria – stood in front of him, having managed to thoroughly tangle herself in her own dress, a twin of Fred's.

"You!" Her imperious voice was muffled somewhat by the layers of cotton wrapped around her head. "Fix this!"

Wesley couldn't help himself.

He burst out laughing.

* * *

**_Forty five minutes later, Angel's office._**

"I am well aware of the fact that we all have things to do." Wesley said in a pacifying tone, trying to rectify the squabbling that had broken out among his friends. "But the fact remains that someone has to keep an eye on the girls."

"Look," Gunn spoke up. "Someone has to this and I think that we should be able to make this decision in a mature, sensible manner. Not It!"

It took less than two seconds for Wesley, Spike and Lorne to latch onto his train of thought.

"Not It!" 

"Not It!" 

"Not It!"

Angel gave his friends a sour look.

"Let me guess," he said dryly. "I'm 'It'?"

TBC.

_Author's Note: What do you think, is it cruel to make Angel deal with both little Fred and little Illyria? Should they be separated? Please review and let me know what you think. I've had a couple of requests for little Fred to cause trouble so I'll be working that into future chapters._


	5. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive. I also don't own any of Disney's films, or the concepts behind said films.

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:_**

_The evil one must have blue hair._

_Harmony must make an appearance in the fic._

_Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

**Author's Note: **Turns out that Illyria is a Shakespearean name. I wonder who picked it out.

Word in / / = Thoughts.

**Chapter 4.**

**_Fifteen minutes later, Angel's office._**

Angel regarded his two small charges with a wary expression. They had been unusually quiet and well behaved since Wesley and the others had left.

He suspected that that was not a good sign.

He fussed around for a few minutes, laying out glasses of juice and a plate of cookies on the small table in front of the television where one of the Disney movies Harmony had very thoughtfully picked up the previous night was playing.

Little Fred, engrossed in the film, barely registered his presence and even Illyria seemed interested in the deer frolicking across the screen.

Heaving an inward sigh of relief, Angel headed back to his desk, confident that the movie would keep the two little girls occupied, for a while at least, and proceeded to deal with his least favourite thing in the world; Paperwork. 

* * *

**_Fifteen minutes later._**

Illyria was becoming thoroughly sick of being trapped in the body of a four year old human.

It was bad enough that her powers had been severely depleted since her transformation and that the humans had the temerity to talk down to _her _as though she were nothing more than a mere child, but worst of all in the little goddess's opinion was that she was actually starting to _enjoy _some of the games that her counterpart insisted on playing, even the video they were watching, featuring species that she _knew _did not speak English, appealed to a part of her.

She had to get out.

Fast.

_/My Qwa'ha Xhan will know what is happening. / _Little Illyria mused. _/He will find an adequate shell for me. He must. /_

* * *****

**_Ten minutes later._**

Angel signed his name in his old fashioned copperplate and added the thick document to his 'Out' tray before taking another from the huge stack in his 'In' tray.

_/Seventeen down, one rainforest still to go. / _

Angel flipped open the document and began to peruse it carefully, checking the small print with meticulous are before he added his signature.

You could never be too careful in this place.

He glanced up from his work to check on the two little girls, who were curled up on the couch, still watching the video.

There hadn't been a peep out of either of them in half an hour.

_/I guess that babysitting isn't as bad as I thought. /_

* * *

**_Five minutes later._**

_/That's it! /_Illyria had had enough of childish pursuits. _If I cannot sense my Qwa'ha Xhan, then I will just have to search for him myself. /_

* * *

**_Ten minutes later._**

"Angel?" A tearful Fred ran across the room to the dark-haired vampire, distraught.

"Fred?" Angel lifted her into his lap, concerned. "What's wrong? Are you hurt? Did Illyria . . .?"

"She's dead!"

"Illyria?"

"No!" Fred buried her head in Angel's shoulder. "His mommy."

"Whose mommy?" Angel was completely confused.

"Bambi's."

"Who's Bambi?" He didn't have a clue what she was talking about.

Little Fred gestured in the direction of the television. "Bambi!"

The penny dropped.

_/Next time, I find out what the film is about, **before** showing it to a little kid. / _He vowed.

Fred continued to sob heartbrokenly.

Angel was at a loss as to how to deal with the crying child in his arms. 

"There, there." He patted her shoulder awkwardly. "It's alright."

"No it's not." Fred's words were barely audible. "Now Bambi doesn't have a mommy." Tears coursed down her soft cheeks. "I want my Mommy."

_/Great. / _This was the last thing that Angel wanted to deal with.

He was willing to bet that in another few minutes, half of the firm's staff would be bursting into his office, thinking that the little girl was being tortured.

"Shh, it's alright." He rocked her in his arms for a couple of minutes, until her sobs had died down to an occasional hiccupping cry. "It's not real, Bambi's mother is alright. She . . ." he racked his brains, trying to come up with a story that would satisfy her. "She lives in the zoo now, with lots of other animals." He announced at last. "She's very happy there. The silly man who made the film made a mistake, that's all."

"Really?" Fred looked up at him trustingly. "You promise?"

"I promise." Angel was relieved to see that she had stopped crying.

"Can we go see her?"

"Uh. . ." Too late he spotted the flaw in his cover story. _/I doubt that the zoo keeps the deer in a nice, indoor habitat. Or that they're open at night. / _"Not today, okay? You can go tomorrow with Wes or Gunn."

She pouted. "Why can't I go today?"

"Because Wes and Gunn are busy."

"Why can't I go with you?"

"I'm . . ." Angel tried to think of an explanation that didn't involve the 'v' word. "I'm allergic to the sun." He told her after a moment's deliberation. "So are Spike and Harmony. If we went outside while the sun was shining, we would get very sick.

Little Fred patted his arm sympathetically. "Poor Angel." She commiserated, her own and Bambi's troubles forgotten. "Is that why you haven't got any freckles?"

He suppressed a laugh at her remark, standing up and lifting her into his arms. "Come on." He made a face in a successful attempt to make her laugh. "Do you want to finish watching 'Bambi'?"

"Uh-uh." Fred shook her head decisively. "Too sad."

"Okay, we'll find something else." Angel headed over to the television and the two beanbag chairs if front of it.

Two _empty_ beanbag chairs.

"Shit."

* * *

Angel marched out of his office, little Fred still held securely in his arms.

"You there," he accosted the first security guard he saw. "We have a Code Red. We've got a potentially dangerous entity roaming loose on the premises. I want every single member of the security team on it, sweep the building from top to bottom. I want . . ."

"Boss?"

"Not now, Harmony." 

"Boss?"

"I said, not now."

"Boss?" Harmony's voice became louder, more insistent.

"What?!" Angel whirled around to face his secretary.

Harmony gestured to the little brunette sitting at the desk with her. "Is this what you were looking for?"

Had Angel been human, his face would have been a bright shade of scarlet.

He offered the security guard a sheepish smile. "Cancel the Code Red."

"Will do." The security guard responded with a barely concealed smirk.

Illyria regarded Angel with an icy expression. "Was there something you wanted?" She asked in chilling tones.

"Not really." Angel settled Fred into a more comfortable position in his arms. "Are you okay with her?"

Harmony, to whom this question was addressed, waved a dismissive hand in her employer's direction. "Yeah, we're fine, bossy."

Not wanting her to change her mind, Angel headed back into the office with Fred. "So," He racked his brains, trying to remember which of the Disney movies was the least likely to upset or frighten. "Do you want to watch 'Beauty and the Beast'?"

The beaming smile Fred gave him was all the answer he needed.

"So," Harmony turned to little Illyria with a smile. "Where were we?"

"My Qwa'ha Xhan." The miniature deity reminded her patiently. "I need to find him."

"Sorry," Harmony shrugged. "They never tell me where they keep the important people. Who is this Quasimoto anyway?"

""Qwa'ha Xhan." Illyria corrected with some asperity. "He is the priest of my order."

"Oh." Harmony brightened. "You mean he's your minion." She sighed wistfully. "I used to have minions."

"Where did you get them?"

"Oh, sweetie," Harmony patted the child goddess's head. "There's a world full of demons and vamps out there just waiting for someone to guide them. Any of them could be a minion."

"Really." Illyria's smile was sly and secretive. "Tell me more."

TBC.

_That's all for now, folks. Please keep the reviews coming, let me know if there's anything in particular you would like to see._

Next Chapter: Lunchtime and one of the girls throws a tantrum.


	6. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive. 

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:  
_**_The evil one must have blue hair.  
Harmony must make an appearance in the fic.  
Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

**Author's Note: **A quick opinion poll - Which characters should go to the zoo? Should I send both girls or just Fred? Wes and Gunn or just one of them?

**Author's Note II: **I'd like to thank gidgetgirl for her taco suggestion.

**Author's Note III: **To cloudofcalm - you're right, it's always the evil one who gets the attention, so I'm giving little Fred the spotlight for now.

Words in / / = Thoughts.

**Chapter 5.**

**_Two and a half hours later._**__

Much as he hated to admit it, Angel had actually enjoyed the movie.

The triumph of inner over outer beauty appealed to the romantic in him and, though he would have denied it under oath, he found the songs quite catchy. 

Little Fred, needless to say, had been absolutely enchanted by the whole film, especially the talking furniture.

Once the movie was over, Fred had curled up on the couch and dozed off for an hour while Angel perused one of the dozen childcare books that Harmony had picked up on her shopping spree, checking on her every couple of minutes to make sure that she hadn't wandered off like her counterpart.

Illyria had elected to remain with Harmony, who was more than happy to have a small protégée to instruct in all matters relating to fashion, make up and the world of vampires.

Angel was just glad that he didn't have to deal with both girls at once.

After sleeping for just over an hour, Fred woke up and wandered over to Angel's desk, rubbing the sleep sand from her eyes.

"I'm hungry." She announced plaintively.

Angel checked his watch. "It's nearly half past twelve. Do you want to have lunch now?"

She nodded emphatically.

"What do you want to eat?"

Her face lit up. "Tacos."

Angel's face fell as he remembered the dirty looks the janitors had shot him when they saw the mess on the carpet and the red sauce stain that had simply refused to be shifted.

"We can order anything you want in," He offered, keeping his tone bright. "We could get pizza," _/At least it's not **as **messy as tacos. / _"Would you like some pizza? Or we could get Chinese food?"

"No thank you." Fred gave him an angelic smile. "Just tacos, please."

"You . . ." Angel took a few seconds to mentally prepare himself for the inevitable showdown. "You can't have tacos."

"But I want tacos." Fred's said in a calm, reasonable tone. "You said I could have whatever I wanted and I want tacos."

"What I meant was that you could have anything you wanted _except_ tacos." Angel argued, feeling slightly hypocritical.

"That's not fair!" Fred pouted. "You said anything. It doesn't matter what you meant, only what you said."

"Well, now I'm saying that you can't have tacos." Angel kept his voice firm. _/Be consistent. Remember what the book said. /_

"Why not?" She stamped her foot petulantly.

"Because you made too much of a mess last night and besides," Angel mentally crossed his fingers, praying that she'd buy his excuse. "It's not good for you to eat the same thing all the time." Her eyes filled with tears and he had to force himself to stick to his resolution. "Now what - besides tacos - do you want for lunch?"

"Nothing." Fred stuck out her lower lip resolutely. "Only tacos."

Angel sighed, irritated. "So you're going on a hunger strike now?" Fred refused to answer him. For a four year old, she was an expert guilt tripper. Angel was starting to wish that he hadn't spoken out against tacos so firmly, that he could reverse his decision without stripping himself of every vestige of adult authority he possessed. "It's not going to work. I'm not going to let you have tacos."

Fred took a deep breath, opened her mouth as wide as she could and screamed.

* * *

**_The lobby._**

Harmony looked up from doing Illyria's nails, alarmed. "God," Her eyes were wide. "Do you think that he's killing her in there?"

Illyria shrugged disinterestedly. "Probably."

* * *

**_One minute later._**

Even with his ears covered, Angel couldn't drown out Fred's combined screaming and sobbing.

His head ached.

Fred may have been a sweet kid, but she could be very single minded when she wanted to be.

He was just about ready to give her tacos, ice cream, candy, the moon if she wanted it.

Anything for a little peace.

_/Boundaries. / _He reminded himself firmly. _/You have to set some boundaries. She'll stop screaming . . . eventually. /_

"What's the hubbub, bub?" A concerned Lorne, followed by Gunn, entered Angel's office. 

"I can hear her from my office." Gunn complained. "What's the matter."

Angel gave his friends a sheepish smile. "She wants tacos."

"So get her tacos."

Fred stopped screaming long enough to give Gunn an approving half smile. At least one of the grown-ups had some sense.

"I can't." Angel hissed under his breath. "I said she couldn't have them. You know what kind of a mess they made last night and besides, we can't give in to her every time she has a tantrum." Despite his resolution, he was very tempted to give her her own way.

"Good point." Lorne acknowledged.

Little Fred, seeing that their support was waning, stopped screaming and directed her energies to crying.

"I've got an idea." Gunn darted  out of the room, returning with something folded in his hand. "Look what I've got, Fred," he crouched down in front of her, breathing a sigh of relief when she stopped crying long enough to let him speak. "These are special tacos."

The four year old gave him a pitying look. "Those aren't tacos, silly Gunn." She said patronisingly. "Those are folded up sandwiches."

Angel cursed under his breath as Gunn let the two faux tacos fall to the floor.

Gunn shrugged. "I tried."

"What's going on in here?" Little Fred, spotting Wesley, ran straight for him, holding out her arms to be lifted up. Wesley scooped her up, rubbing her back soothingly before turning to the others. "Well?"

"Angel's being mean!" 

Wesley glared at the vampire, tightening his protective grasp of Fred. "What did you do to her?"

"What did _I _do?" Angel was incredulous. "_She's_ the one who was screaming her head off!"

"You must have done something to provoke her."

"He won't let me have tacos for lunch." Fred announced tearfully, snuggling into Wesley's arms. "You'll let me have them, won't you?" She said coaxingly, a beseeching expression in her eyes.

The other three men shook their heads vigourously.

Wesley sighed, setting Fred to her feet and kneeling in front of her, her two hands in his. "Fred," His voice was gentle. "Do you know what a compromise is?"

"Uh-huh." She nodded. "It's when people all get a little bit of what they want so that everybody's happy."

_/Close enough. / _"Now you can have tacos for lunch. . ."

"Wesley." Angel interrupted warningly. "I don't think. . ."

". . .But you have to have something different for dinner _and _you have to apologize to Angel for screaming at him. Okay?"

Fred took a moment to consider his proposal before nodding gravely.

The adults let out simulataneous sighs of relief.

Little Fred gave Angel an innocent smile. "Sorry I shouted at you." She headed over to him and hugged his legs. "Are you mad?"

It would have taken someone with a heart of stone to resist her.

Angel had no chance.

"I'm not mad at you." He patted her head. "But no more tantrums, okay."

"Okay." She agreed cheerfully. "Can I have my tacos now?"

"Sure." Angel shot Wesley a wicked grin. "But you have to eat them in Wesley's office."

The former Watcher's face fell.

_/Damn! /_

TBC.


	7. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive.

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:_**

_The evil one must have blue hair._

_Harmony must make an appearance in the fic._

_Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

Author's Note: I've decided to have both little girls go to the zoo and, since I don't hate Wesley enough to leave him at the mercy of two four year olds, Gunn will be going too. 

Words in / / = Thoughts.

*

**Chapter 6.**

**_Angel's Office, half past eight the next morning._**

"Tell me again why I have to do this?" An aggrieved Gunn demanded. 

"I promised Fred that she could go to the zoo today and I can't take her myself, for obvious reasons." He nodded towards the window, whose specially reinforced glass shielded the vampire from the sunlight streaming in.

"Why can't Wes go?"

"Wesley is going." 

"So why do I have to go too?" 

"Because Illyria is going too and the two of them are too much trouble for one person to deal with."

"Why does Illyria have to go?" Poor Gunn was doing his best to get out of this assignment.

Angel shrugged. "She wants to. Besides," He lowered his voice. "I want to keep her away from Harmony. I think Illyria is a bad influence on her."

Gunn sighed. "Is there anything I can say that will get me out of this?"

"No."

* * *****

**_An hour later._**

"Okay, girls, what do you want to see first?" 

"Bambi's mommy." Fred insisted, clinging to Wesley's hand. "Angel said that she was here and I want to see her." She gave the former Watcher her best puppy-dog expression. "Please?"

"Alright, sweetheart." Wesley, who had heard Angel's account of the previous day's upset, smiled at her. "We'll go to see the deer first. What about you, Illyria?" The little goddess paid no attention to him.

"Illyria?" Gunn spoke her name a little louder.

The little goddess looked up at him, wrinkling her dainty nose in distaste. "There are too many humans here." Little Illyria declared. "They have a foul odour."

Her voice was not loud, but it was clear and carrying and several passers-by overheard her and were shooting the quartet dirty looks.

Gunn sighed.

This was going to be a long day.

* * *

"See, love." Wesley lifted Fred up so that she could get a better look at the deer walking about in the large, enclosed space reserved for them. "Bambi's mother is just fine."

Fred exhaled in relief. "That's good." She said seriously. "Someone should tell Mr Disney that he made a mistake with his film."

"We'll talk to Lorne about it tonight." Wesley assured her, matching her solemn tone.

"Wesley?" Fred put her arms around his neck, laying her head on his chest and looking up at him with an angelic expression. "Can I have a deer?"

* * *

"I'm hungry." Illyria announced in a demanding tone. "Get me something to eat, you."

Gunn glared at his little charge, mentally cursing Wesley for being the first to claim the relatively easy job of taking Fred to see the deer. "I have a name, you know." He rebuked her.

"Yes, I'm sure you do." Illyria's tone was icily condescending. "But I cannot be expected to remember such an insignificant detail. Now get me something to eat. Now. Or I'll . . ."

"Or what?" Gunn grinned. "You don't exactly intimidate me."

Illyria stamped her foot in a temper. "Do not to presume to speak to me with such disrespect!"

"I'll talk to you any way I want to." Gunn retorted, growing irritated.

Illyria gave him a chilling smile. "Yes, I suppose that I ought to be grateful to you. After all, without you, I wouldn't be here, would I?"

Gunn could have sworn that his heart had stopped beating. _/The sarcophagus! / _"How do you . . .?" His voice was hoarse.

"I have my ways." The miniature deity smiled. "I'm sure that your friends would be very interested to learn about that. Now," She met his eyes. "Get me something to eat."

* * *

**_Ten minutes later._**

"Charles, look what Wesley got me." Little Fred ran forward, clutching the plush stuffed deer Wesley had persuaded her to accept in lieu of a live animal. "And we saw Bambi and his mommy and all their friends and everything and Wesley says that we can go see the seals having their breakfast in a little while and ride the train and everything."

Gunn smiled absently as he listened to Fred's happy prattling, a sober expression in his dark eyes.

Wesley, noticing the unusual seriousness of his friend's expression, waited until Fred and Illyria had headed off to examine the ducks swimming in the pond before speaking.

"Is everything all right, Charles?"

"Fine." Gunn made an effort to smile. "Why wouldn't it be?"

* * * 

**_Twenty minutes later._**

"Wesley." Little Fred tugged on his shirt. "I can't see."

The seals' feeding time seemed to be one of the zoo's most popular attractions.

By the time Wesley, Gunn and the two girls had arrived, a wall of people stood between them and the pool where the seals were frolicking for the amusement of their viewers.

Wesley lifted Fred up in his arms so that she could have a better view. He looked down at Illyria, who was glaring at the back of the person standing in front of her.

Gunn had gone to pick up some sodas for them, otherwise Wesley would have had him carry the child goddess. 

The former Watcher shifted little Fred to his right arm, and was trying to work out if he would be able to balance both girls at once when Illyria scowled up at him, her dark eyes flashing.

"Make these vile humans get out of my way." She demanded loudly. "These filthy beings are blocking me. Make the repulsive creatures move."

Wesley felt his cheeks grow warm as those nearest to Illyria turned to shoot disapproving looks at the little goddess and at him.

Illyria took advantage of the distraction to push her way into the front row, ignoring the indignant cries of the people she shoved aside.

"Well!" A middle-aged woman turned to Wesley with a wrathful expression. "What a spoilt little madam! And her language!"

Poor Wesley just wanted the earth to open up and swallow him whole.

* * *

Three hours later. 

"Here you go, ladies," Wesley handed each girl a paper plate laden with food. "I'm sure that you're both hungry.

"Thank you, Wesley."

"Give me my food."

He sighed. He didn't think that it was humanly possible to teach Illyria anything resembling manners.

"Is there anything else either of you would like to see before we go home?" He asked, praying that they would answer in the negative. _/After three and a half hours of traipsing around this place, I'm ready for a nice, quiet evening with my feet up. / _Wesley thought wrathfully.

Four year olds had far too much energy.

Illyria shrugged non-committally, her attention on her lunch.

"Do they have dinosaurs here?" Fred asked curiously, her eyes lighting up at the thought.

"I'm afraid not." Wesley told her gravely, not wanting to hurt her feelings by laughing.

"Okay, guys," Gunn, returning from yet another run to the refreshment stand, spoke up. "They have a train ride here. How about we take a ride on that, then we hit the playground for a while, and then we go home. Sound good?"

"Uh-huh." Fred accepted the soda Gunn handed her with a smile. "Thank you."

Illyria gave Gunn a poisonous smile as he handed her her drink. "Thank you, _Gunn_." She put a mocking emphasis on his name.

Wesley regarded the two little girls disapprovingly. "Those are their fifth sodas, Charles." He said warningly. "Perhaps we shouldn't over do it.

Gunn laughed. "Chill, Wes. They're sugar free. What's the worst that could happen?"

* * *

**_Ten minutes later._**

"Wesley." Fred tugged on his shirt cuff impatiently. "I gotta go."

"You have to . . ." Wesley's face paled as he realized what she was saying. "Oh."

"It's okay." Gunn spoke in a pacifying tone. "The public restrooms are over there." He indicated a gaily-painted arrow pointing in the direction of a low, white building.

"I can't go by myself!" Poor Fred was almost in tears. "Mommy says always have a grown up with you in a strange place, just in case something bad happens."

"You can't go into the Ladies with her." Gunn pointed out unnecessarily. "There'd be an uproar. And I for one don't want to have to explain what we'd have to explain if we brought her in through the other side, if you know what I mean." He paused. "You know, they really don't think about men taking their little girls out when they build these restrooms, do they?"

 "Perhaps we ought to complain before we leave." Wesley said dryly. "In the mean time," he indicated Fred, who was squirming uncomfortably. "We have a more pressing situation to deal with." He sighed. "Hand me that napkin, will you, Charles?"

Gunn picked up one of the last of their clean napkins and handed it to the other man with a quizzical expression. "What do you want this for?"

* * *

Making sure the makeshift blindfold was firmly in place, Wesley led Fred past the row of men at the urinals and steered her into one of the cubicles, shutting the door behind her and standing just outside while she used the facilities, ignoring the titters of the other patrons.

Gunn was right.

The zoo was no place for a man with a little girl.

* * *

**_An hour later._**

"Wesley, look at me!" Fred called from the top of the slide.

"I'm watching." Wesley smiled as the little girl slid down head first, giggling happily.

"She really likes you." Gunn observed. He grinned wryly. "I guess that some things never change." He looked down at Illyria, who was sitting next to them at the picnic table. "Do you want to go and play?" he asked.

The little goddess glared at him. "I have no desire to _play_." She told him scornfully, ruthlessly suppressing the little voice inside her that urged her to join her counterpart on the swings and slides.

Gunn shrugged. "Your loss."

"Did you see me? Did you?" Fred ran up to Wesley, chattering excitedly.

Wesley ruffled her hair, an indulgent smile on his face. "I saw you. Very impressive."

Little Fred turned to Illyria, her eyes sparkling. "Do you want to play? It's fun."

Illyria shook her head firmly.

"Come on." Fred pleaded, reaching out to take the other child's hand.

The instant their hands made contact, Illyria's eyes glowed with a fierce, triumphant light.

"My Qwa'ha Xhan." She said softly.

An instant later, a dazed Wesley and Gunn were left alone, staring in dismay at the spot where the two girls had been.

TBC.


	8. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive.

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:_**

_The evil one must have blue hair._

_Harmony must make an appearance in the fic._

_Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

**Author's Note I: **I'd like to thank my beta, Botticelli's Venus, for her help proof-reading this chapter.

**Author's Note II: **I'm adding teleportation and telekinesis to Illyria's list of party tricks.

**Author's Note III: **To fischergirl – Don't worry, nobody is going to hurt little Fred. Do you honestly think that Wesley, Angel or any of the rest of the gang would let them if they tried?

Words in / / = Thoughts.

*

**Chapter 7.**

**_Same time, Wolfram and Hart Containment Area._**

Nobody ever believed him when he told him that the law firm he worked for had a dungeon in the basement.

The first time he had been told of it, he had been convinced that his colleagues were trying to pull his leg.

Now, Knox was getting first hand experience of the Wolfram and Hart containment area and he was finding it less than pleasant.

Although the building was designed and built to the latest standards of modern architecture, some perverse quirk on the part of the designer had led him, her or it to go with the traditional dank, medieval look for the dungeon.

Judging from the smell, Knox assumed that the plumbing was also of medieval standards.

He had awoken in the miserable cell, chained to a damp, mildewed wall after Gunn had so rudely bludgeoned him over the head with a metal canister.

Since then, he had been subjected to repeated interrogations and threats from Angel, who couldn't quite seem to grasp the fact that Knox would rather bear any form of unimaginably brutal torture rather than betray his goddess.

Despite the strength of his convictions, he _was_ becoming rather worried about the fact that the Divine One had not yet appeared, drawn to the sacred sacraments imbedded beneath his skin and, though he would never have admitted it, he was more than a little unnerved by Angel's vague references to chainsaws.

_/My Goddess will come for me. / _Knox thought, a little desperately. _/She has to. /_

No sooner had the thoughts formed in his mind than the dismal cell was illuminated by an ethereal blue glow.

Moving as fast as his heavy fetters allowed, Knox flung himself to the ground, prostrating himself on the cold, stone floor.

"I have waited for so long to bask in your radiance, O Sacred One." He murmured, his heart surging with joy at the thought of being in the presence of his deity.

"You are my Qwa'ha Xhan?"

Knox frowned. Her voice was not as he had expected it to be. It was higher, lighter.

"Rise."

Knox hastily climbed to his feet, keeping his eyes glued to the ground, not entirely sure what the correct protocol was for a first audience with the ancient goddess.

"You are taller than my last Qwa'ha Xhan." His goddess announced. "At least," Her tone became doubtful. "You appear to be."

"My humble stature is magnified by the glory of your presence O Celestial One." Knox pledged reverently, finally lifting his eyes. "I am your loyal servant, O Div . . ." He trailed off as his brain registered what he was seeing. "Oh sh*t!"

"Quite." Little Illyria's lips were pressed together in a scowl entirely unsuited to her childish features.

Little Fred, whose hand she still held, sucked her thumb as she regarded Knox solemnly, not saying anything.

Knox gulped. _/This can't be good. /_

"O Divine Majesty," He began, a little shakily. "Forgive me. I . . ."

"Enough!" Illyria's childlike voice resonated throughout the narrow confines of the cell. A flick of her hand sent the hapless Knox flying across the cell, careening into the stone wall. "You have failed me."

* * *****

**_Angel's office._**

"Wes, slow down. I can barely make out a word of what you're saying. What happened?" Angel's frown deepened as the former Watcher's words became coherent.

Spike, dropping by for his usual afternoon taunting, took one look at his grandsire's serious expression and wisely kept his mouth shut.

"You lost them?!" Angel exploded. "How did you lose them?! Both of them!"

"Boss?" Harmony knocked on the door before entering.

Angel scowled at her intrusion.

"What?" He barked, too concerned about little Fred's whereabouts to control his temper.

Harmony instinctively took a step back, wanting to put some distance between herself and her irate employer before continuing.

"Security just called." She told him in a meek voice. "There's been a security breach in the containment level.

Angel's scowl deepened as he met Spike's eyes, knowing that they were on the same wavelength.

"Knox."

* * *

**_Knox's cell._**

Illyria paced back and forth in the narrow confines of the cell, taking the longest strides that her short legs allowed.

She paused, turning on her heel to glare at the cringing Knox.

"This was not what was to happen." Her words sounded strange in her childish voice. "I was to return in a form that would have allowed me to re-establish my kingdom. Instead, as a result of your failure, I return thus." She scowled at her small hands. "Scarcely stronger than a human child." Without warning, the little goddess's voice took on a distinct note of whining. "It's not fair!" She stamped her foot petulantly, yearning for the days when such a gesture on her part would have brought armies to their knees. "I want my world back. NOW!"

"Yes, O Divine One." Knox grovelled hastily, anxious to placate his irate deity. "Our numbers may be few, but we shall . . ."

"Few?" Illyria looked stricken, like a small child who had just learned that there was no Santa Claus. "But what has become of my army?"

"Gone." Knox shook his head regretfully. "There are only a handful of us left. A _faithful_ handful." He added hastily, wanting to worm his way back into the miniature goddess's good graces.

Little Illyria waved aside his protestations of fidelity aside as though they were of little or no consequence. "How will you restore my world?"

"There's nothing I can do about that." Knox ducked slightly as he said it, not wanting a repeat of his encounter with the wall.

"Can we go back to the zoo now?" Fred was scared by everything that had happened in the past minute or so. "Wesley will be worried and we'll get into trouble for going off by ourselves." She glared at her counterpart. "Even though it was all your fault.

Illyria ignored her. She drew herself up to her full, not very considerable height and gave Knox her most intimidating glare. "If my army is gone, then you must bring me a new one." Her casual tone made it sound as though Knox would be able to purchase a demonic army at the nearest convenience store. "I will not accept excuses." She informed him. "Your success in this matter _may _balance out your previous failure."

Knox, knowing the unpleasant fate that had befallen others who had failed Illyria, nodded hastily. "I will." He pledged. "But I . . ." He gestured to the cell. "You know."

"Of course." Illyria inclined her head graciously. Ignoring little Fred's indignant protests, she snatched the other child's hand in hers, smiling in satisfaction as the room was once again enveloped in an ethereal glow.

* * *

"How long has it been since the alarm went off?" Angel asked, striding rapidly towards the door, flanked by Spike and a contingent of security guards. 

"Approximately three minutes, sir." One of the team volunteered.

Angel swore under his breath. He had a sneaking suspicion that the child goddess could do a lot of damage in three minutes.

_/She's far more powerful than we thought. / _He thought ruefully.

The guards took up positions on either side of the door and Angel nodded to their leader, allowing him to open it.

His heart sank when he saw what had happened.

"Bollocks!" Spike exclaimed, rushing towards the fallen bodies of the two little girls. He caught the wrist of the child nearest to him and a relieved smile spread over his features. "It's alright.' He looked over at the stricken Angel. "They've just fainted."

TBC.

_Author's Note: If anyone thinks this chapter is a bit strange, please rest assured that there **is **method to my madness. _

_I'll have the next update ready as soon as I can. In the meantime, please review._


	9. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive. **__**

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_****__**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there.****_

**_Requirements:_****__**

_The evil one must have blue hair.___

_Harmony must make an appearance in the fic.___

_Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

**Author's Note I: **Sorry about the delay in updating, it's exam time and studying is taking up more of my time than I would like.****

**Author's Note II: **To Stolen Childe – I was going to do something similar with Wes, Gunn and the zoo. It would be funny to see the dumbfounded looks on Angel and Spike's faces though, so I'll keep it in mind for a future chapter. Thanks for the suggestion.****

**Author's Note III: **To Imzadi – Sorry, I don't have any plans to include Lindsey in this story, in fact, I don't even know what happened to him after the Senior Partners took him – stupid Sky One is weeks behind – but I suppose that he and Fred do look a bit alike. I have started on another gidgetgirl challenge starring Lindsey and Fred as brother and sister so you should check that out.****

**Author's Note IV: **I apologise if the sciencey part is complete and utter bullshit, I know next to nothing about biology.

Words in / / = Thoughts.

*

**Chapter 8.__**

"It's quite fascinating, really."

Wesley wanted to hit the lab tech who, in the absence of the Department Head and the Department Manager, was temporarily in charge of the Practical Science Division.

"We took some blood samples – it's easy when you know how –" None of the Angel Investigations team were moved in the least by the man's ingratiating smile. "And the results were intriguing, to say the least." He switched on the television, displaying a split screen of two blood slides. "Now on the left we have the sample we took from Subject A, Subject B's sample is on the right."

"They have names." Wesley pointed out tartly. Since he and Gunn had returned from the zoo, he had remained glued to the bedside of little Fred, who slept peacefully throughout the conversation.

Little Illyria was similarly dead to the world.

"Right." The lab tech fumbled with a switch, showing a close up of the left hand blood sample. "As you can see, Subj . . . I mean Miss Burkle's blood sample is perfectly normal. Completely human. As for the second," He switched the view to the second sample. "Outwardly normal but," He zoomed in closer. "On closer inspection . . ."

"The blood cells are supercharged." Wesley finished, fascinated by the tiny tendrils of blue electricity sparking between Illyria's red blood cells.

"Precisely." The tech grinned. "Now," he nodded to one of his colleagues. "When we add a drop of Miss Burkle's blood to the sample we drew from Illyria" His assistant did so. "It really turns up the heat."

Wesley, Angel, Gunn, Lorne and Spike all watched, torn between horror and fascination, as the energy crackling between Illyria's cells amplified, until the red of the cells was almost completely overshadowed by a blue glow.

"It's interesting to note," The tech added. "That adding Illyria's blood to Miss Burkle's has no such effect."

"What about growth?" Wesley, who was doing the best job of following the scientific explanation, asked. "Will Miss Burkle age?"

"Yeah." The tech nodded. "Their cell division rates are perfectly normal for a four year old child. They'll age as fast as any other kid."

"I don't get it." Angel, the product of an eighteenth century education system, often had trouble grasping anything beyond the most basic scientific principles. "Illyria becomes more powerful when she and Fred are touching, right?" The tech nodded confirmation. "Then why did we find them passed out on the floor?"

The tech beamed at him, gratified to be asked a question. "That's the really cool part." Catching sight of the expressions on the faces of his audience, the tech blushed. "Sorry." He muttered sheepishly. "Bad choice of words. When Miss Burkle's blood is added to Illyria's, the power boost is only temporary.  Afterwards . . ." He gestured towards the screen, where only an occasional spark of blue energy distinguished the two samples. "The power flow exhausts their physical energy reserves," The tech informed them. "It takes a while for Illyria to recharge."

"Will Miss Burkle be all right?" Wesley demanded, tenderly stroking the hair of the sleeping child. Although the thought of losing Illyria did not bother him (or anyone else) in the least, he would not have been able to cope if he lost the little he had left of the woman he loved.

"Sure." The tech grinned. "Little kids have a tendency to bounce back like rubber. By this time tomorrow they'll be back to running all over the place, driving you all insane."

For the first time since their friend had been torn apart, split into two little girls, the five men found this news more than welcome.

* * ***__**

**_Nine o'clock, the following night._**

"Are the munchkins asleep?" Lorne asked, looking up as Wesley returned to Angel's office, where the other adult members of the Fang Gang had gathered.

When Wesley nodded, his four colleagues breathed a simultaneous sigh of relief.

Happily, the two little girls had recovered from their collapse with a speed reserved for small children and Angel.

Unfortunately for their guardians, their day of rest had left them with even more energy than usual and between them, they had managed to thoroughly exhaust their carers.

Angel didn't think he'd ever get over the shock he'd had when he left his office to get a cup of blood and returned to find little Fred building some kind of contraption with half the contents of his weapons shelf.

Wesley, to whom she had run when the brooding vampire tried to scold her, had maintained that it was Angel's own fault for leaving her by herself, then proceeded to lecture him on exposing small children to dangerous circumstances.

Illyria had spent the day sulking over the temporary loss of the few powers she had maintained, demanding to stay with Harmony and amusing herself by systematically antagonising every client that she met.

The High Priest of the Rhomboli Clan had left in fury, swearing eternal vengeance on everyone at Wolfram and Hart after Illyria had insulted both his parentage and his manhood, and then used his ceremonial staff as a javelin.

They'd be lucky if they didn't end up with a feud on their hands.

"Has there been any sign of Knox?" Wesley's lower lip curled in distaste at the mention of the name.

"None." Angel wasn't sure whether this qualified as good news or bad. "He seems to have gone underground."

"Good riddance." Spike commented bitterly.

"I haven't been able to dig up anything with my contacts either." Gunn chimed in. "He's disappeared off our radar."

"Has our resident mini-deity let anything spill on where exactly she sent him?" Lorne asked.

"Not a hint." Wesley answered regretfully. "And Fred doesn't know. Has anyone made any progress as to how to restore her to her original state?"

"Sorry, pal," Lorne patted Wesley's shoulder sympathetically. "I've got nothing."

"I tried to contact Willow." Angel looked ticked off. "She's on an astral plane somewhere. I tried to leave a message with Giles." He scowled. "He hung up on me."

"So no witch coming to save us?" Gunn looked glum. "Figures."

Angel shook his head, torn between sorrow, anger and fear. "We're on our own." He looked up at his friends. "And I have no idea what we are going to do."

TBC.


	10. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive.

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:_**

_The evil one must have blue hair._

_Harmony must make an appearance in the fic._

_Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

**Chapter 9.**

**_Three days later, ten o'clock in the morning, Gunn's office._**

The worst part about having been an older brother, Gunn reflected sourly, was that it seemed to give people the impression that you were good with children.

Ordinarily, he wouldn't have had a problem with babysitting, he liked kids and had always gotten along quite well with them when he was a teenager but taking care of his mystically youthened friend, especially when he was partially responsible for her transformation, was a decidedly uncomfortable experience.

To be fair, Angel, and Wesley in particular, had been taking more than their fair share of babysitting duties and Gunn _had _been offered his choice as to which of the two girls he wanted to take charge of but he would still have been more than happy never to be left alone with the pint-sized reminder of his mistake.

Part of him would have given anything to be able to tell his friends about the part he had played in the arrival of the sarcophagus and in Fred's transformation, if only to ease his conscience.

The other, sadly stronger, part of him would not allow him to speak, fearing his friend's reactions, their anger and, worse still, their disappointment.

Thankfully, little Fred, supplied with paper and crayons, was being as good as gold.

Gunn made a mental note to thank Angel for the drawing lessons he had given the little girl the previous day.

Since then, there had scarcely been a peep out of the four year old as she devoted her time and energy to producing enough drawings to paper half of the building.

Gunn was amused to see that most of little Fred's works of art depicted a very familiar bespectacled English man.

Needless to say, he was more than happy that his young charge was amusing herself rather than demanding his constant attention. 

In the past few days, the Angel Investigations team had been neglecting their various duties as they worked on a cure for Fred, meaning that Gunn now had a pile of case files and paperwork taller than he was, to deal with.

He sighed.

_/Better get stuck in. /_

* * *

**_Angel's office._**

"You understand everything that I've said?" Angel grilled his secretary.

Harmony heaved a dramatic sigh. "I've got it, bossy. No giving Illyria advice on how to take over the world. No encouraging any violent or destructive tendencies. No hints about where to find minions. Is that all?"

Angel glared at her. "Harmony, the only reason that I'm trusting you to keep an eye on Illyria is . . ."

"That nobody else can cope with her." Harmony finished dryly.

Angel had the grace to look sheepish. "Pretty much."

* * *

**_An hour and a half later, Gunn's office._**

"Charles?"

Gunn flashed the little girl a grin. "What's up, baby girl?"

Fred scowled. "I'm not a baby."

"Sorry. What can I do for you?"

"I need more paper." Fred informed him.

"Again?" Gunn raised an eyebrow. "Didn't anyone ever tell you that we have to save the rainforests?" Fred gave him a puzzled look. "Never mind." He liberated a few more sheets of paper from his printer and handed them to her. "Are you writing a book or something?" He asked teasingly.

"It's a surprise."

"Really? Can I get a hint?"

"It's not for _you_, silly." Fred told him blithely, not noticing that she was being rather rude. "It's for _Wesley_."

"Of course." Gunn gave her a slight smile. "You'd better get to work then, hadn't you?"

"Uh-huh." Fred took the paper eagerly and returned to her spot on the floor, flopping down on her stomach before taking the jumbo box of crayons that Harmony had bought for her, selecting the colour she wanted with as much care and deliberation as if the fate of the world rested on the shade of blue she used, the got to work on her picture.

Gunn shook his head, amused. 

_/At least she's behaving herself. /_

* * *

**_Twenty-five minutes later, the lobby. _**

"I don't know who she thinks she's fooling." Harmony snorted derisively, stabbing the offending picture in her gossip magazine with an accusing finger. "She so does not have the legs to wear a mini skirt."

Little Illyria nodded her agreement, despite the fact that she had not understood a word of what the vampire was saying.

So far, Harmony had given the little goddess a manicure, painting the nails a glittery blue that Illyria quite liked, done her hair in half a dozen ways before settling on a French plait threaded with a primrose yellow ribbon that matched the embroidery on the child's white cropped top and even experimented a little with make-up. 

Illyria had endured the primping stoically, preparing herself for the moment when she could make her request known.

"My Qwa'ha Xhan has failed me." She told the vampire solemnly; unaware of how adorable she looked when she wore a serious expression on her little face. "He was supposed to gather an army for me, but he has not done so."

Harmony laughed. "Knox? I'm surprised that that guy can tie his shoes! He couldn't fetch milk, let alone an army."

"Exactly." Illyria slipped her hand into Harmony's. "I need a Qwa'ha Xhan who will serve me better. Someone who will serve me faithfully. You are far better than my pitiful excuse for a Qwa'ha Xhan."

"Liri?" Harmony's voice was gentle. "Are you asking me to be your new Qwa'ha Xhan?"

A smile of relief spread across the miniature deity's face. Finally! She had been hinting for several days now, thoroughly fed up with waiting for Knox. While Harmony was not up to the standards she was accustomed to in her servants, she was the best Illyria could expect in her present circumstances.

"Yes." She gave Harmony her sweetest smile. "I would like you to replace my Qwa'ha Xhan."

"Sorry, kiddo." Harmony shrugged apologetically. "No can do."

Illyria's small face fell.

"Why not?" She demanded. "When I rise to power again, my Qwa'ha Xhan, and all the priests of my order, will enjoy the most exalted positions in the new regime."

"I'm sure they will." Harmony spoke pacifically. "But I won't be one of them."

"Why?" The child goddess looked stricken. "Winifred has a minion. Why can't I have one?"

"It's not that." Harmony patted her head sympathetically. "It's just that once you've had your own minions, you can't go back to being someone else's. It would just be so demeaning."

Illyria was silent for a moment as she took in the blonde vampire's answer. The enormity of all she had undergone in order to win Harmony over to her side hit her like a ton of bricks. 

Manicures, make-up, hairdressing, gossiping, answering to that stupid nickname, listening to her inane prattle day after day after day. 

Her small face contorted in rage.

"I HATE YOU!" Her shriek was loud enough to wake the dead. "I WANT MY ARMY BACK! IT'S NOT FAIR! IT'S NOT FAIR! IT'S NOT FAIR!" She flung herself to the ground, pummelling the floor with her small fists and kicking for all she was worth..

"Liri!" Harmony's voice was sharp. "Calm down. Now."

The child flew at her, pummelling her with all her strength. "I WANT MY MINIONS! NOW! NOW! NOW!" She made a beeline for Harmony's desk, snatching up every item she could find and flinging them at the unfortunate vampire.

Harmony, showing remarkable patience, endured Illyria's tantrum until the little goddess did the unthinkable.

"Illyria." Harmony thundered, her voice cold. "Put. The. Unicorn. Down. NOW!"

Her eyes blazing with defiance, Illyria flung Harmony's prized glittery unicorn to the floor, stomping on it with all her strength.

_/There. / _She glared up at the vampire. _/What are you going to do now? /_

* * *

**_Thirty seconds later._**

"Unhand me, you filthy half-breed! How dare you treat me in this fashion!"

Ignoring her, Harmony marched through the halls, an indignant Illyria tucked under her arm, struggling and kicking as hard as she could.

She opened the door to one of the unused offices, depositing Illyria inside before closing and locking the door.

"You stay in there until you've calmed down." She commanded with more authority that anyone could have guessed she possessed. She glared at the cluster of people gathered around, drawn by the commotion. "What? You've never seen an ancient demon goddess get a time out before?"

* * *

**_Ten minutes later, Gunn's office._**

Listening to Illyria's screams, which were audible, even from his office, Gunn was more relieved than ever that his charge was so quiet and well behaved.

He had been able to plough his way through a good tenth of his workload and, if Fred continued to be such a little angel, he would be finished by some time next week.

His phone rang and he picked it up with a sinking feeling, knowing that it was probably not a social call.

"Charles Gunn?"

"Gunn?" He recognized Lorne's voice. "I've got a client here who needs some help with his contract. Could you spare a minute?"

"Sure." Gunn sighed inwardly. "Fred and I will be down in a few . . ."

"Maybe you shouldn't bring the little cupcake." Lorne suggested. "He's being somewhat . . . vocal." He finished delicately. "It'll just be for a minute. Two, tops."

"Okay." Gunn looked over at Fred, who was still drawing. _/She'll be all right for a couple of minutes. / _He told himself. _/She probably won't even know that I'm gone. / _"I'm on my way." He told Lorne.

"Thanks." The empathic demon hung up.

Gunn smiled down at little Fred. "I'll be back in a few minutes, alright." If you need anything, tell Jenny." He nodded towards the next office, where his assistant was working.

"Okay." Fred didn't even look up from her drawing.

Satisfied that she would be alright by herself, Gunn left the room to straighten out whatever problem's Lorne's foul-mouthed client was having with his contract.

* * *

**_Five minutes later._**

Fred reached out to take another sheet of paper, only to find, to her disgust, that she had run out.

Gunn was gone and she didn't know how to open the printer to get more paper.

She sighed, looking down at her incomplete project.

_/I wanna finish so I can show Wesley. / _She thought. 

She looked around the room, anxious to find another surface to work on.

Her eyes fell upon the perfect blank space.

_/Poor wall. / _She shook her head sadly. The wall looked so dreary and lonely. _/Go on. / _A small voice inside her urged. _/It's just like a big piece of paper. / _She bent down to scoop up a handful of crayons before turning to the wall. _/Don't worry, wall. I'll make you pretty. /_

TBC.


	11. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive.

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:_**

_The evil one must have blue hair._

_Harmony must make an appearance in the fic._

_Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

**Author's Note I: **To cloudofcalm - Don't worry, help is on the way in the next chapter, I won't drag on forever.

**Author's Note II: **To blackbeltchic – Firstly, Wow! You really put a lot of thought into judging. Secondly, thanks for all your interest in the story. If you want me to answer your questions, just send me your e-mail address.

Words in = Thoughts.

****

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 10.**

**_Half an hour later._**

"Sorry that took so long." Lorne said apologetically. "If I had known that he had so many questions . . ."

"It's cool." The grim expression on Gunn's face let Lorne know that this was not the case. "I just hope that Fred's okay. I asked Jenny to keep an ear open for her, but still . . ."

"Come on." Lorne smiled. "What's the worst that Fredilocks could have done?"

"I'm about to find out." Gunn opened the door to his office. "Fred!"

The little girl started when she heard Gunn's angry bellow, dropping the handful of crayons she held, scattering them all over the floor. The angry expression in his eyes frightened her a little.

"I'm sorry." Her lower lip trembled. "I didn't mean to." She slipped closer to Lorne, putting her small hand in his large green one, relying on his protection.

"Oh, she's so adorable!" Lorne cooed, hugging her to him. "Look at this face. How can you be mad at her?"

"You're not helping." Gunn told him from behind gritted teeth. He turned his attention to the little girl hiding behind Lorne's leg. "Why did you do that?" He gestured towards his newly decorated wall.

Fred, knowing that she was in trouble, employed her best defence.

She burst into tears.

"Fred, stop crying." Gunn injected a note of sternness into his voice. "You're in big trouble and you're not doing yourself any favours."

"You're mean." Fred announced between sobs.

"She's just a little cutie-pie." Lorne interjected pleadingly. "Go easy on her."

Truth to tell, Gunn found the incident amusingly reminiscent of the adult Fred's wall equations nearly three years ago and only the desire not to have the rest of his office similarly adorned kept the frown on his face.

"What's wrong?" Angel, followed by Wesley who had been talking to a less that repentant Illyria, had been drawn to Gunn's office by little Fred's crying.

"Gunn's nasty!" Little Fred launched herself at Wesley, knowing that he would defend her. "He doesn't like my muriel."

"Who's Muriel, love?" Wesley asked, bewildered, scooping her up in his arms.

"My muriel." Fred gestured towards the wall. "I made it pretty and Gunn doesn't like it."

"It's a wonderful mural, darling." Wesley told her gravely, hugging her. "But I think that Charles is upset because you didn't ask first."

"He was gone." Fred protested. "I couldn't."

Wesley glared at Gunn. "You left her alone?" It was more of an accusation than a question.

"I was only going to be gone for a minute."

"long enough for her to do that." Wesley nodded in the direction of Fred's elaborate mural.

Little Fred snuggled into Wesley's arms, looking up at him with pleading eyes. "You like my muriel, don't you?"

"Your mural." Wesley corrected automatically. "Yes, it's lovely." He smiled at the sight of one of the figures. "Is this me?" The stock figure was distinguishable from the others by his brown hair and glasses.

"Uh-huh."

"But I'm hardly this handsome."

"Yes you are." Fred told him firmly. "Lots handsomer that the princes and the knights in those stories you told me. So I made pictures. It was going to be a surprise but then Charles" She gave Gunn a dirty look. "Started shouting."

It took a few seconds for Wesley to realise what she had been up to.

She had taken all of the fairy tales he had told her over the past few days and rewritten them, starring him as the hero.

He was touched.

"Aw! That's so sweet." Lorne exclaimed adoringly. "And she does have a point – the décor in this lace is duller than Grandma's shoes."

"Don't encourage her." Gunn hissed under his breath. "I've got meetings with half a dozen clients scheduled for after lunch. How can I expect them to take me seriously with that" He waved a hand in the direction of Fred's mural. "On my wall?"

"Relax." Angel's lip twitched as he made a valiant effort to suppress a smile. "You can use another office for today and the cleaners should be able to have this office cleaned by tomorrow."

Little Fred burst into fresh sobs, wrapping her arms around Wesley's neck and burying her face in his shoulder.

"He hates my mural!" She wailed, her voice muffled slightly. "It took me ages and he wants to wreck it."

"There, there." Wesley rubbed her back soothingly. He gave his friends a helpless look. "Maybe we should leave it." He suggested.

"No way!" Gunn was appalled by the idea.

"I don't wanna stay with Gunn anymore." Fred announced, clinging to Wesley. "He's nasty. I wanna go with you."

"It's alright, darling." Wesley rocked her for a few moments. "You can come to my office if that's what you want."

"Not so fast." Angel had a sudden vision of the entire building being adorned with Fred's crayon wall art. Wesley seemed to be physically incapable of saying no to the little girl and, although she usually behaved for him, there was no telling what she could talk him into letting her do. It was with a sinking feeling that Angel realised that he was the only member of the group with any parenting experience. _What would I do if it was Connor? / _He winced at the pain that thought caused him. "Winifred and I need to have a little talk first."

Fred's eyes widened at the utilisation of her rarely used given name.

"I'm in trouble, aren't I?" She already knew the answer. Apart from her grandmother, nobody ever called her Winifred unless they were mad at her.

"Yes." It would have been impossible to overestimate the effort it took for Angel to keep his expression and his tone stern when faced with Fred's puppy dog eyes.

"Is this really necessary?" Wesley reluctantly set the little girl to her feet and, with her hand held securely in his, he stood glaring at Angel.

"We can't have her doing stuff like this all the time." Angel pointed out logically. We have to teach her right from wrong or she'll never learn."

"It's not your place to teach her." Wesley argued hotly, his own memories lending vehemence to his tone.

"One of us has to." Angel said simply. He met the other man's eyes. "She'll be fine." He reassured him gently. He reached out to take Fred's small hand, drawing her firmly from Wesley's protective grasp. "I'll drop her over to your office as soon as we're done."

Keeping her hand firmly tucked in his, Angel led the little girl out of Gunn's office, completely at a loss as to how he ought to proceed.

* * *

**_Angel's Office._**

"Now," Angel sat down in one of the chairs in his office, directing Fred to stand in front of him, leaning forward so that there faces were level. "Would you like to tell me why you drew on Gunn's wall?"

"I ran out of paper." The four year old mumbled, her eyes on her shoes. Even to her own ears, this was starting to sound like a feeble excuse.

"Why didn't you ask someone? I know that Gunn wasn't there, but his assistant was right next door. You could have asked her. Or you could have waited until Gunn came back. Why didn't you?"

"I don't know."

"Didn't anyone ever tell you that it's not nice to draw on walls?" His tone was almost hopeful. If she answered in the negative, he could assume that she didn't know any better and avoid his unpleasant – not to mention awkward – duty.

"Mommy and Daddy say not to." She admitted reluctantly.

"So why did you?" She shrugged. "I want an answer, Winifred." Angel's voice took on a warning note.

"I don't know." Little Fred was close to tears. She had always been able to get around her parents, but from the looks of things, Angel wasn't going to let her get away with this.

Angel sighed, gently cupping her chin with one hand and tilting her face so that she was obliged to look him in the eye. "You're old enough to think before you act and you should know better than to draw on other people's walls." He would have given anything not to have to do this. "I'm afraid that I have to punish you."

"How?"

Angel had no idea.

The childcare manual that over the past few days had become his Bible had advocated making the punishment fit the crime, but he was shrewd enough to realize that making her wash the wall she had 'improved' would result in the wall, carpet and child becoming thoroughly soaked, without actually shifting any of the stains. Even if Wesley didn't stake him for it, Angel could never bring himself to hit a small, defenceless child, particularly one who was a miniature version of one of his closest friends. Confining her to her room would have been pretty pointless – for one thing, it was full of toys, for another he wasn't willing to leave her unsupervised.

He wasn't left with many options.

"Corner." He replied at last. He stood, taking her shoulders and steering her towards the far corner of his office. "I want you to stand here, facing the wall."

She pouted. "For how long."

_/An hour? No, that's too long. Five minutes? Too short. /_

"Fifteen minutes." He announced after a moment of deliberation.

Fred's brown eyes filled with tears. "That's too long."

"No arguments." Angel frowned reprovingly. "Corner. Now."

Sulking, the little girl obeyed, kicking the skirting a few times to vent her frustrations.

Angel set his digital watch for fifteen minutes and returned to his desk, busying himself with some paperwork.

_/It's only fifteen minutes. / _Angel told himself firmly. _/It'll be over soon. /_

* * *

**_Five minutes later._**

Angel was in Hell.

Little Fred had been crying softly since her punishment had begun, making him feel like the world's biggest bastard – as she intended.

Only the knowledge that to remit her sentence would both confuse her and shatter the slight authority he and his adult friends wielded kept Angel from running to comfort the little girl.

Angel felt very awkward about disciplining someone else's child. He knew that he would have been pissed off if a stranger had presumed to chastise Connor, had he grown to this age in his father's care.

_/Who would have thought that **Fred **would have been so much trouble. /_

* * *

**_Nine minutes later._**

_/Come on. Come on. Come on. / _Angel glared at the counter on his digital watch, willing it to move faster.

There was no doubt in his mind that this punishment was harder on him than it was on Fred, whose heart-rending cries had died off to an occasional whimper once she had realised that her tears were not having the desired effect.

Thirty seconds to go . . .

_/I don't care what Fred does from now on. / _Angel vowed inwardly. _/I can't go through this again. I can't be the 'bad cop'. /_

Fifteen . . .

_/I hope that she doesn't hate me for this. I couldn't take that. /_

Five . . .

_/Four. Three. Two. One. / _Angel counted silently.

BEEP-BEEP. BEEP-BEEP.

_/Thank God! /_

Angel let out a sigh of relief and thanksgiving. He walked over to Fred, laying a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Times up." He told her. "You can go now."

Fred turned, holding out her arms in a mute appeal to be lifted up.

Angel scooped her up, grateful that she didn't seem to resent him – Illyria had torn the room apart when she was punished – and carried her back to his desk, sitting her on his knee. He searched through his drawer until he found a handkerchief, then tenderly dried her eyes.

"Feel better?" he asked after a minute or so of rocking.

"Uh-huh." Fred snuggled closer to him. "I'm sorry."

"Don't worry.' Angel gave her a lopsided smile. "You're four. It's your job to make trouble. Just try not to be a workaholic, okay? I don't want to have to do this again."

"Me neither." Fred made a face. "Corner time is _boring_."

Angel chuckled. "I bet you're hungry. I'll take you to Wesley's office for your lunch. And then a nap." He added, seeing her unsuccessful attempt at suppressing a yawn. "And Fred?"

"Yes, Angel?"

"Try not to get into any more trouble, at least for today. Okay?"

Little Fred nodded solemnly. "I promise."

* * *

****

**_Nine o'clock that night, Fred's room._**

_"It was a very strange thing indeed. She quite caught her breath as she stopped to look at it. A boy was sitting under a tree, with his back against it, plating on a rough wooden pipe. He was a funny looking boy of about twelve. He looked very clean and his nose turned up and his cheeks were as red as poppies, and never before had Mistress Mary seen such round and such blue eyes in any boy's face. And on the trunk of the tree he leaned against, a brown squirrel was clinging and watching him,"_

Wesley paused in his reading, glancing down at the sleeping child in his arms.

Little Fred was out for the count, her eyes closed, her cheeks rosy with sleep flush, her breathing soft and even.

Moving slowly so as not to wake her, Wesley gently transferred the little girl from his lap to her bed, tucking the quilt around her and making sure that Feigenbaum, whose unearthing had been met with a joyous reception on Fred's part, was placed securely in her arms.

"Don't stop." A small voice interrupted from the corridor. "Continue reading."

Wesley frowned at the intruder. "Illyria." His voice was tinged with distaste. "You ought to be in your own suite."

"I couldn't sleep."

"And what, pray tell, do you expect me to do about that?" He asked icily.

Ignoring the curtness with which he spoke, Illyria approached, a little shyly, and sat down on the end of the bed.

"My world is gone." She sounded desolate. "My army has been destroyed and I have no faith in my worthless Qwa'ha Xhan's ability to raise a new one. My powers are crippled and even when I join with the other half of my shell, I am less than a shadow of what I once was." Though her words were mature, her voice became more childlike and her eyes filled with tears. "I'm starting to forget things I used to know and remembering things that never happened to me, things that happened to her. I can't remember where my first temple was or how I was defeated in my last battle, but I remember climbing a tree to try to touch the sky. I remember falling. I remember catching a bee, wanting to learn how it flew." She looked down at her small fingers, frowning at the memory. "It hurt. I remember games and ice cream and that." She gestured towards the stuffed rabbit clutched in the sleeping Fred's arms. "Feigenbaum. I remember these things but they never happened. Not to me." The tears started rolling down the little goddess's cheeks. "But I can't remember what did. Her memories displace mine, more every day. I can't live like this. I can't stay in this world. If I do, I will be little more than a human child, in mind and in body. I don't belong in this world." Her voice was barely audible. "I want to go home."

"Don't you think that I would send you back if I could?" Wesley demanded harshly, more moved than he cared to admit by the little deity's words. "I would like nothing more. But I can't. You're stuck with us and we're stuck with you."

"Wesley," He flinched as little Illyria reached out to lay a tentative hand on his shoulder, clearly uncomfortable. "I need your help." She paused before continuing. "Please. If I can't go home, then I need you to help me find my place in this world. Will you help me?"

It was on the tip of his tongue to refuse, but she was so like the woman he had loved, the child he had come to adore.

"Yes." His voice was quiet. "I'll help you."

TBC.

_Extract taken from 'The Secret Garden' by Frances Hodgson Burnett._


	12. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive.

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_****__**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:_****__**

_The evil one must have blue hair.___

_Harmony must make an appearance in the fic.___

_Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other_

**Author's Note I:** To gidgetgirl – Thanks for your nickname suggestion a few chapters ago. I've adapted it a bit to suit my twisted, demonic purposes.****

**Author's Note II: **To Imzadi – Having a timeout, trashing the office, then sulking. And I'm afraid there'll be no Lindsey in this story. I really can't think of a reason they'll want him back within the next chapter or two.****

**Author's note III: **To Freezyboncoolipants – I know, neither could I, but he had to do something to discipline her and I couldn't think of much else.

**Author's Note IV: **Apologies to anyone who is reading 'The Happiest Place On Earth'. I know it's been ages since I updated. I've had a bit of writer's block as far as that story is concerned. Once the holidays start I should be able to finish it.

Words in = Thoughts.

* * *

****

**Chapter 11.**

**_Half past nine, the next morning, Angel's office._**

"So," Angel gave his friend a wry grin. "Which one do you want?"

The green-skinned Pylean looked decidedly disgruntled. "Do I have to?"

"Yes." Angel's voice was firm.

"Doesn't Wesley want to do it?" Lorne asked hopefully. "He's wonderful with Freddikins. He could take her, you could take Baby Blue and I could enjoy a nice brunch with Gwynth."

"Sorry." The dark haired vampire didn't look or sound even slightly remorseful. "Wes has barely eaten or slept since Fred . . .you know. If he isn't taking care of her, he's researching. I sent him home for the day. He's not allowed back in the building until he's ha some rest."

Lorne utilized a Pylean expletive hitherto reserved for his mother. "You're a cruel man, Angelcakes, a very cruel man."

"Hey!" Angel was mildly insulted. "I _am _giving you first choice here."

Lorme glanced across the room, where the two little girls were sitting on the couch, looking through picture books, identically dressed in pink gingham sundresses – Harmony didn't seem to have bought anything that wasn't pastel, frilly or both – completely indistinguishable to his discerning eye.

Angel followed his friend's gaze. "So, do you want the one on the right or the one on the left?"

Lorne glared at him. "Ever think about dressing them in different outfits, strudel?"

Angel looked sheepish. "Well, they seem to like dressing alike and Harmony bought two of everything so . . ." He trailed off. "I've tried getting them to change. Illyria screams, Fred cries, it's not worth the trouble. You have to pick your battles." He finished solemnly, sounding more like a general planning field tactics than a temporary guardian of two little girls. "Now stop stalling and pick one." He ordered, amused by Lorne's procrastination.

Lorne studied the solemn faces of the two little girls, trying and failing to find a gesture or a facial expression that would tell him who the good one was.

_/Although, after yesterday, I think that we've just got two bad ones. / _He reflected mournfully. After another moments deliberation, he pointed to the child on the right. "I'll take Door Number One, chief." _/It's a fifty-fifty shot. /_

"Congratulations." Angel's smile was positively devilish. "You've just won an ancient demon goddess."

Lorne's face fell. "No, wait, I've changed my mind . . ."

"Too late." Angel motioned Illyria over. "Have fun."

"But I . . ."

Before Lorne could argue any further, he found himself ushered out of Angel's office with little Illyria, and the door was shut firmly behind them.

"So," He looked down at his new charge, apprehension in his eyes. "Do you like singing?"

The look the child goddess gave him was one of pure, unmitigated disgust.

* * *

**_Twenty minutes later._**

The mild punishment Angel had inflicted the previous day had proven to be effective.

Motivated by the threat of further corner time if she misbehaved, little Fred was acting like a model child.

In the four year old's sage opinion, time spent in the corner meditating on her sins was the vilest thing imaginable. Her mind was so active that every minute she spent without occupation seemed to drag on for an hour.

It was torture and, in her opinion, it just wasn't worth it.

While Fred worked on designing a cover for her revised book of fairytales, Angel ploughed his way through his far less pleasant tasks, pausing every now and again to smile fondly at the little girl.

He missed the adult Fred. She had been the first person to truly accept him and he would always love her for that but, as painful as losing her was, he was beginning to enjoy having her child self around.

_/I must be going soft. / _Angel thought with a rueful chuckle.

* * *

**_Lorne's office._**

After growing up in the bosom of his 'loving' family, Lorne was no stranger to uncomfortable silences.

That didn't mean, however, that he _enjoyed _them.

Illyria, fully occupied with a child's picture encyclopaedia, determined to learn everything she could about humans, despite her less than stellar reading ability, had not said two words since they had settled down in his office.

Lorne was rather put out by her pointed ignoring of him.

He had no desire to sit around playing Candyland and dress-up – well, maybe he wanted to a little – but some small acknowledgement of his presence would have been nice.

_/I bet Angel's having more fun than me. /_

* * *

**_Angel's office._**

"HARMONY!" Angel bellowed at the top of his lungs.

Little Fred covered her ears, giving Angel a plaintive look. "Too loud."

"Sorry, sweetheart." The term of endearment slipped out unconsciously. "It's just . . . Harmony." He glared at his secretary as she scuttled into his office. He stabbed the computer screen detailing his schedule with an accusing finger. "Why do I have a meeting scheduled with the heads of the five branches of the Krat'ma'hen clan scheduled for ten o'clock today? You told me that that meeting was on the seventeenth. Tomorrow."

"Today is the sev . . ." Quailing under Angel's glare, Harmony hurriedly counted out the dates on her fingers. She bit her lip, embarrassed. "Oopsy."

"Wonderful." Angel scowled. "What am I supposed to do about . . .?" He nodded in Fred's direction. "Gunn's in court all morning, Wesley's at home, Lorne already has Illyria, you have to take notes for the meeting. That just leaves . . ." Angel's face fell. He sighed in defeat. "Harmony, I need you to make a call."

* * *

"No bloody way!"

"Spike, you know I wouldn't ask if there was any possible alternative."

The blond vampire threw up his hands in exasperation. "I've got plans, Captain Brood. Important, ungetoutofable plans."

"Bring her with you."

"Why don't you keep her with you?" Spike demanded. "I've got a . . .a meeting."

"So have I." Angel's voice was grim. "I'm meeting with the five branch heads of the Krat'ma'hen clan, very powerful, not to mention frightening demons who are highly likely to mistake her for a canapé." He scowled at his grandchilde. "Are you?"

"No, but. . ."

"Good." Angel scooped Fred up and passed her into Spike's unwilling arms. "Don't let anything happen to her." He leaned forward to plant a kiss on the top of the little girl's head. Be a good girl for Spike." He paused, reconsidering. "Well, you don't _have _to be . . .Just go!" He chivvied Spike out of his office, closing the door behind him so that he could skim through the files on the Krat'ma'hen clan in the five minutes left before his guests were due to arrive.

Spike was left standing out in the hallway, little Fred in his arms, caught on the horns of a dilemma.

Should he abandon his biggest winning streak in the past decade, forfeiting his winnings to date if he didn't return, or should he risk scarring his small charger for life by letting her sit in on a game.

_/On second thoughts, / _Spike mused. _/The little bit's seen plenty of weird stuff in the past couple of days. My buddies won't even make her blink. /_

"So," He said aloud. "You're good with numbers, right?"

* * *

**_Five minutes later._**

"Uh-uh."

"Fred!"

"I don't wanna!"

"I'm your sitter, pet, you have to mind me." Spike reminded her firmly.

"I won't." Fred crossed her arms across her chest stubbornly.

"You're asking for a smacked backside, missy!"

"You won't." Fred responded tranquilly, not put out in the least by Spike's empty threat. It hadn't taken her long to figure out that Spike's bark was worse than his bite.

"Come on, luv," Spike wheedled. "I'll be unhappy if you don't."

Fred shook her head firmly, unmoved by his emotional blackmail.

"How about a compromise?" Spike suggested, remembering Wesley's success during what the adult members of the Fang Gang had termed the 'taco incident'. "You come with me for an hour, them I play dollies or whatever you want for an hour."

"Half an hour for your game." The four year old bargained shrewdly. "Then two hours of mine." She set her chin determinedly. "Take it or leave it."

"Fine." Spike said gratefully, holding out his hand. "Time for me to give you a crash course in poker."

* * *

**_Fifteen minutes later._**

"Spike." Little Fred tugged impatiently on the vampire's shirt.

Spike sighed. "What's up, luv?"

"Thumper's sad."

Spike looked over at the grey, furry demon whose long ears had earned him his less than flattering nickname. His face was completely devoid of expression.

"No he's not."

"Yes he is." Fred hissed insistently. "His cards aren't as nice to him as yours."

Spike glanced up to see 'Thumper's poker face falter for the briefest of instants. He grinned. "Call." He displayed his hand with a flourish. "Read 'em and weep, boys."

'Thumper' growled and the brown demon Fred had named 'Bambi' bared his teeth threateningly.

"You never said you were upping the stakes." He complained in a slightly gravelly voice, watching the little girl with covetous eyes and baring his pointed teeth.

Spike scowled at him. "Back off, you wanker! The little bit's not up for grabs."

"Spike?" Fred shot him a curious look. "What's a wanker?"

Spike correctly guessed that Angel and his friends would be less than pleased if he taught their miniature friend to curse.

"A wanker's a very nice person, pet." He lied. He smiled happily as he gathered together his mewing winnings.

The little girl had her uses after all.

* * *

**_An hour and a half later._**

Spike was beginning to regret using the phrase 'whatever you want' in his agreement with Fred.

After several rounds of Candyland, little Fred had decided that she wanted to play 'House' with him, which, as four year old's games went, wasn't the worst.

He could have borne it, except for his role . . .

"Here's your bottle." Fred shoved a doll's bottle she had charmed one of the mail guys into filling with warm milk into his mouth. "Drink up, then you can take your nap."

Even without seeing his reflection, he knew that, between the ridiculously small bonnet she had balanced on his head and the tea towel tied around his neck for a bib, he looked absurd as he sat on the miniature chair as his 'mommy', wearing a large fuchsia straw hat and a long string of pearls, tried to spoon feed him.

"Do I have to be the baby, pet? Can't I be the daddy?"

"No." Fred looked appalled at the idea. "That's _Wesley's_ job."

"Wesley isn't here."

"Doesn't matter." Little Fred told him solemnly. "Wesley has to be the daddy 'cause I'm gonna marry him when I grow up."

Spike couldn't argue with that. He took a swig from the bottle, making a face. Even when he had been human, warm milk had been pretty far down on his list of favourite drinks. He waited until his 'mother's back was turned before topping up the bottle with liquid from his hip flask.

He sipped gingerly before taking a long swallow.

_/It's not half bad, really. /_

"Now," Fred beamed at him as she came back to the table with a plate of unidentifiable mush. She scooped up a generous spoonful and waved it around in front of his face. "Here comes the aeroplane."

Spike, seeing no alternative, obediently opened his mouth.

From the doorway, unnoticed by either the vampire or the child, Angel watched, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"Are you getting all of this?" He asked sotto voce, giving his secretary a conspiratorial wink.

Harmony nodded in satisfaction, clutching the camcorder tightly.

Spike was going to freak!

* * *

**_Half past eight that night, Angel's office._**

Wesley, after swearing that he had had eight hours sleep and a good meal, was allowed upstairs to say goodnight to little Fred, mostly because she had stubbornly refused to go to bed until he had read her a story.

While Wesley sat on the couch, reading to little Fred, who sat on his lap, and little Illyria, who hovered to the side, doing her best to look uninterested and Lorne unwound with a Sea breeze, Angel tried once again to persuade Giles to let him talk to Willow.

The Watcher had staunchly refused to listen to Angel's arguments or pleading and had hung up, as he always did after a couple of minutes.

Spike, thrilled over his winnings and ever so slightly tipsy after half a dozen bottles of whiskey and milk, sauntered into the office with a grin on his face.

"What do you want, Spike?" Angel asked curtly, still ticked off with Giles.

"Aren't you just a regular little Mary Sunshine?" Spike gave him a sarcastic smirk. "Got a present for the little love, seeing as she helped me win it."

Before any of the adults could stop him, Spike tipped his gift into Fred's lap.

The four year old scooped up the black bundle of fur with an ecstatic smile. "A kitten!" She flung her arms around Spike's neck, hugging him tightly. "Thank you!" She turned to Wesley with a pleading expression. "Can I keep her?"

"It's a him, pet." Spike was enjoying the discomfort in Angel and Wesley's faces. "So can she, Percy?"

Wesley couldn't say no.

"What are you going to call him?" Angel asked, trying to hide his apprehension at having another small mess creator roaming the building.

Fred clutched her new pet to her, beaming up at its donor. "Wanker."

As one, Angel, Wesley and Lorne turned to glare at the less than contrite Spike.

The blond vampire grinned.

He doubted that he would ever have to babysit again.

* * *

**_An hour and a half later._**

Angel waited until the two little girls were in bed and asleep before he called a council of war.

Looking around at the faces of Wesley, Gunn, Lorne, Spike and Harmony, he sighed deeply.

"We need to make some long term plans, guys." He spoke in a low voice. "Fred and Illyria have been here for nearly a week and we're no closer to finding a solution than we were the day they arrived. Giles was pretty adamant about nobody from Sunnydale coming to help and even with our Wolfram and Hart resources, we haven't made any progress. We need to figure out what to do with the girls. If we have to, we can contain Illyria, but Fred is another matter. Should we contact the Burkles, let them decide, maybe send her back to Texas with them?"

"We can't." Wesley's voice was firm. "My contacts have already intercepted several kidnap threats against both girls, some from Illyria's worshippers, a couple from people interested in them as a collector's item." Wesley's expression registered his disgust. "A demon psychiatrist is offering an eight figure reward for anyone who delivers the girls to him to study. We won't be able to protect Fred if she leaves."

"Are you suggesting we raise Fred and Illyria here?" Gunn was incredulous.

Spike snorted in derision. "In that case, we'll need Mary Bleedin' Poppins."

"No you don't." A familiar and very welcome voice drew their attention to the doorway, where two young women were standing. Willow grinned, delighted with the impact her entrance had had. "I think you need a witch."

TBC.


	13. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive.

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:_**

_The evil one must have blue hair._

_Harmony must make an appearance in the fic._

_Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

**Author's Note I: **To Imzadi – While I'm sure that the girls would love Lindsey, the adult members of the Fang Gang hate him and there's no way in hell that they would let him babysit.

**Author's Note II: **To Perfect Darkness – You must really hate Wesley and Co. Two teenagers? That's inhuman!

**Author's Note III: **Thanks for all the reviews, everyone. I'm so sorry it's taken so long for me to update but now that exams are over, I have more time to write.

Words in = Thoughts 

* * *

**Chapter 12.**

"Willow!" A relieved Angel pulled the red haired Wicca into a suffocating hug before realising what he was doing and stepping back sheepishly. "Sorry. What are you doing here? I thought . . . I mean, Giles said . . ."

Willow smiled, gesturing towards the dark haired young woman at her side. "You're just lucky that Faith has no manners and no qualms whatsoever about listening in on Giles' private phone conversations and passing the information on." She gave the Slayer a mock-chiding look. "Faith had me pulled out of the astral plane and told me everything. The coven already knew that something was up. They had felt the power." She gave Wesley a sympathetic smile. "It seems that you have a friend in a high place."

Faith looked around the room, her dark eyes taking in the toys and picture books scattered all over Angel's office, the drawings tacked to the walls. "Looks like you guys have been kept busy."

"We have a video." Angel announced proudly, giving Spike a sly smile.

His grandchilde snarled at him.

"That's nice." Willow beamed. "Now let's get Fred back so that we can embarrass her with it." Her expression became solemn. "I'll need all the information you have on this Illyria."

Wesley gave her a wry smile. "I'll introduce you in the morning."

* * *

**_Half past eight, the next morning, Angel's office._**

"They're so cute!" Willow exclaimed adoringly.

Even Faith, never one to ooh and aah over little kids, had to admit that the two identically dressed little girls made a sweet pair. _/Of course, that probably means that they're a pair of little monsters underneath. /_

Little Fred, plagued by a sudden attack of shyness, clung to Wesley's hand, her thumb in her mouth, remaining half hidden behind the former Watcher's leg.

Illyria regarded Faith with unconcealed dislike. "Slayer." Her childish voice dripped with loathing, a scowl on her small face. "I saw the creation of your order. The protectors of the humans." She glared at Faith. "Without your kind, the humans might have died out long ago and I would have had a fitting kingdom to return to."

Faith returned the scowl with a sarcastic smile, not bothered in the least by the pint-sized deity's venom. "Aren't you sweet."

The miniature goddess snarled at her.

"Illyria." Wesley's voice held a warning note. "Manners." He hugged the other child to him. "Fred, these are our friends, Willow and Faith." The little girl clung to his side. "She's shy." He elaborated unnecessarily.

Willow nodded understandingly, bending down so that her head was level with Fred's. "Hi, Fred. I'm Willow. I'm here to help you guys."

"Restore my powers." Illyria demanded, sounding more like a spoilt child than a fearsome demon deity. "Now!"

"Wouldn't if I could." Willow responded casually but gently, not put out in the least by little Illyria's glares. She smiled at Fred. "If it's okay with you, I'd like to ask you a couple of questions, so that we can figure out how to send you home. Would you like that?"

Little Fred hesitated, biting her lip thoughtfully. "I don't know. I miss my Mommy and my Daddy lots but it's fun here. I like playing with Wesley and I don't wanna leave Wanker here on his own."

The fluffy black kitten, untroubled by the new arrivals, was happily watering Angel's carpet.

* * *

**__**

"Are you sure that's all you remember, Fred?" Willow pressed gently. "It could be very important."

"I told you." The four year old was fidgeting impatiently, wanting to end the inquisition so that she would be free to play. "I was playing outside and then I was here and I didn't know how." She gave Wesley a beseeching look. "Can we play Experiment now?"

Willow raised an eyebrow. "Experiment?"

While the medics had been running tests on her in the lab, little Fred had been fascinated by their work and, under Wesley's supervision and the guidance of one of the lower ranking lab techs, she had been performing a few simple experiments herself.

Wesley had the grace to look sheepish. "Long story. Are you done for now?" Willow nodded. He held out a hand to Fred. "Come on, sweetheart, we can go to the lab if you want to."

Fred needed no second prompting. Scooping up Wanker, who had been banished from the office by an irate Angel, she took Wesley's hand and practically dragged him out of the room.

Willow turned to Illyria, who was kicking her chair, a mutinous scowl on her little face.

"What about you?" Demon goddess or not, Illyria's child form meant that Willow couldn't bring herself to speak unkindly. "Can you remember anything about the Deeper Well?"

"Peace." Illyria sounded rather far away. "Quiet. Eternal sleep." She sighed, sounding like a tired old woman. "Would that I could return."

Willow gave her a small sympathetic smile. "I see." She made an effort to sound cheerful. "You can run along with Gunn now. I've got research to do."

* * *

**_Half an hour later, the lab._**

"See, Wesley?" Fred's small brow was furrowed in concentration as she added the yellow liquid to the beaker of water, being careful not to spill any. "The oil stays on top of the water because it's lighter. And even though this looks heavy" She showed Wesley and Wanker the block of wood in her small hand before dropping it into a second beaker of water. "It floats too."

"Fascinating." Wesley watched as intently as if she had made the greatest scientific breakthrough of the century.

"Wesley?" Fred spoke up shyly. "Am I gonna go home?"

"It depends." Wesley said carefully, not wanting to get her hopes up. "Willow might not be able to help. Would you like to go home?"

"Kinda." Fred threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. "But I'd miss you. And I'm scared something bad'll happen."

He rubbed her back gently. "Whatever happens, I'll make sure that you're alright, I promise you that."

"Hey, munchkin." The lab assistant assigned to guide his pint-sized employer's first steps in the world of science greeted cheerfully. "I've got some nice combustibles here. Wanna try your hand at homemade fireworks?"

"What about this?" Wesley asked hastily, snatching up a rock from the counter where Fred's samples were laid out before she could agree to the assistant's dangerous proposal. "Will this float too?"

The four year old sighed inwardly, reaching for the sample and launching into an explanation about why rocks didn't float.

Homemade fireworks could wait.

She had a Wesley to educate.

* * *

**__**

**_Later that evening._**

"Red?" Faith tapped her friend's shoulder. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah." Willow sighed. "I've been researching Illyria, everything I could find in Wesley's archives, I even astralled, trying to get in touch with the forces behind the magic but anything I can find is so dangerous . . ." She exhaled slowly. "Why couldn't it have been something straight forward, like raising Buffy from the . . ." She trailed off, a slow smile spreading across her face. "I've got an idea."

TBC.

_Author's Note: Not much longer left now. One more chapter, maybe two, plus an epilogue. Thanks for reading and I apologise again for the update delay._


	14. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive.

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:  
_**_The evil one must have blue hair.  
Harmony must make an appearance in the fic.  
Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

* * *

**Chapter 13.**

**_Angel's office._**

"No." Wesley's voice was hoarse. "Absolutely not."

"I agree." Angel backed his friend up. "It's too dangerous."

"I know." Willow sighed. "If there was any alternative, I'd take it but it's the only way to get Fred back the way she was."

"We can't risk it!" Wesley exclaimed. "It would be better to leave them as they are than to take this chance."

The red-haired witch shook her head sadly. "It wouldn't work out that way, Wes. They're not supposed to exist as separate individuals. Illyria was supposed to completely overshadow Fred. You were given a reprieve, but it's only temporary. Unless we do something now, you only have a couple of weeks, a month at most before they start to reintegrate. As it is, they're creating havoc with the cosmic balance just by being here. I'd say that there's a ninety percent chance that the girls will reintegrate as Illyria by the end of the month."

"That still leaves ten percent." Gunn's tone was hopeful. "That's better than nothing. If there's a ten percent chance that we can save Fred without taking this chance . . ."

"It wouldn't work that way." Willow interrupted gently. "I visited the astral plane today. Their auras are starting to mesh. Soon they'll be sharing thoughts, memories, souls, everything."

"Illyria mentioned something about some of Fred's memories replacing her own." Wesley spoke quietly.

Willow nodded. "She's at a disadvantage. She's a little more out of her element than Fred is but it won't be long before Fred starts to experience Illyria's memories. Even if they don't reintegrate physically, they'll reintegrate mentally. They'll be left as Illyria-Fred hybrids, with Illyria in the driving seat, like one kid in two bodies. Once they grow up their powers will have developed fully, if your scientists are right, and they'll be even more dangerous than one Illyria would be. You know what that would mean for the world."

"You're asking us to kill her." Wesley could barely speak. The idea was too horrible for him to grasp.

I wish that I could think of something better." Willow's eyes were dark with regret. "But the only way to reintegrate the girls as Fred is to send Illyria back where she came from and make sure that Fred is close enough so that their physical bodies reintegrate once Illyria is gone, otherwise, she'll die when her counterpart does. I won't lie. There's a good chance that this process will kill Fred. But, hey," She made a determined effort to look cheerful. "It's not like I haven't brought anyone back from the dead before."

* * *

**_Later that night, Fred's suite._**

Wesley had had to make difficult decisions before.

The decision to join forces with Angel, effectively turning his back on everything he had been taught at the Watcher's Academy by working with a vampire, had ended up transforming him as a person, giving him a strength and a confidence that would have astonished anyone who had known him when he was younger.

A choice that should have been the hardest he ever faced, a decision made in the blink of an eye, to kill his father to save the woman he loved.

Deciding to pursue a relationship with Fred, despite knowing the potential pitfalls of an office romance, the very real dangers they faced every day.

Had he been able to do it all over again, remake his choices, Wesley wouldn't have changed a thing.

With little Fred too young to make the choice for herself, with the Burkles being kept in blissful ignorance and with none of his friends willing to assume the burden of this decision, Wesley was left facing the most painful decision of his life, one that nobody should ever have had to make.

To stand by and watch as the person he loved more dearly and more deeply than he had ever loved anyone was overshadowed, forced out of her body by an ancient deity who would use her form to wreak havoc, or to take a chance, to risk everything on the slim possibility that she could be brought back.

He had no idea what he should do.

"Wesley!" The small object of his thoughts tugged at his hand impatiently. "You're not listening to me."

"Sorry, love." Wesley brushed a lock of hair out of her face, glancing down at the closed book in her hands. "It was a lovely story." He ventured, having heard scarcely a word of the bedtime story that she had been reading to him.

Little Fred gave him a sceptical look. "What was it about?"

"Uhh . . ." The back cover of the book was decidedly unhelpful. "I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention. I was thinking."

"About what?"

"Something I have to decide." He hugged her close.

"Is that why you're sad?" She touched his face with her tiny hand. "If you talk about it, you'll feel better."

"I don't think that's going to help, darling." He said gently.

"You don't know until you try." Little Fred pointed out logically. "Tell me."

Wesley gave her a small smile. "Alright."

Sensing a story, little Fred climbed into his lap and curled up in his arms, scooping a purring Wanker into her own arms.

Wesley paused for a moment, trying to come up with a way to phrase his story so that the four year old would understand. He took a deep breath before beginning.

"Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess who was lost in a horrible world . . ."

* * *

**_Illyria's suite._**

"Do you want anything else?" Harmony asked cheerfully, tucking the covers more closely around Illyria.

The little goddess refused to say a word to the vampire, she just lay there scowling at her.

"Liri?" Harmony was rather hurt by the silent treatment.

"Don't call me that!" The small deity snapped, her indignation breaking through her self-imposed silence. "My name is Illyria." She kicked moodily at the covers. "The sooner I am returned to the Deeper Well, the better. I can no longer tolerate this world. When I return in a few millennia, perhaps the human pestilence will have succeeded in wiping itself out." The little goddess smiled at the thought.

"Here's hoping." Harmony smiled cheerfully, mortally offending Illyria by bending forward to give her a hug. "I'm going to miss you."

"Harmony?" Illyria gave the vampire a small smile. "Will you do something for me?"

"Depends. What is it?"

"I need you to track down the priests of my order. Kill my worthless Qwa'ha Xhan and make sure that the others know that I am not to be disturbed again while the humans hold sway on this world."

"Will do." Harmony grinned. "Can I eat him?"

Illyria nodded graciously. "If you wish."

Harmony ruffled her hair gently. "Liri, if I was going to be anyone's minion, I'd be yours."

* * *

**_Half an hour later, Fred's suite._**

"So you see my problem?" Wesley kissed the top of the little girl's head. "What do you think I should do?"

"Try to save the princess, of course." Fred told him solemnly. "What else are you going to do?"

"But it's so dangerous!"

"It always is in good fairytales." The four year old informed him. "Look." She opened the book to show a beautifully drawn illustration of a castle surrounded by thorns, guarded by a dragon and a prince, looking very small, even on his white horse, charging into the fray, his sword held aloft. "It was really dangerous for the prince to try to get to the castle where the princess is sleeping but he did 'cause he loved her and if he hadn't she'd have died anyway - after a hundred years of sleeping she'd have starved to death. But he saved her and they lived happily ever after. In fairytales, sometimes you have to take a chance." She finished wisely. "It's always worth it in the end. If I was the princess, that's what I'd want you to do."

Wesley smiled at her. "Is it?"

"Of course. You can't have 'happily ever after' if you don't try. Besides," She smiled up at him. "Princesses are tougher than they look."

TBC.


	15. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: **Since my name is not Joss Whedon, 'Angel' and all the characters associated with the show belong to someone who isn't me. I also don't own the storyline - that's taken from gidgetgirl's 'Twice The Trouble' Challenge, posted on the Chocolate Covered Strawberries Challenge Archive.

**_'Twice The Trouble' Challenge_**

_A Fred Throwback. In season five of Angel, Illyria's attempt to takeover Fred's body is thwarted by the Powers that Be, and the result is that, when Illyria enters Fred's body, the body splits in half: into two identical little girls, save one has blue hair. The Angel gang has to keep little Illyria (if that's her name...) from taking over the world, and take care of little Fred. You take it from there._

**_Requirements:  
_**_The evil one must have blue hair.  
Harmony must make an appearance in the fic.  
Both Gunn and Wes must babysit... one of the girls must like each of them better than the other._

**Author's Note I: **This is going to be the last chapter of 'Two Of A Kind'. Writing it has been fun and I hope reading has too. I'd like to thank everyone who reviewed this story and a special thank you to gidgetgirl, for thinking up the challenge and to my beta, Botticelli's Venus.

**Author's Note II: **For those of you reading 'The Happiest Place On Earth', there is one chapter to go and I'll have that up as soon as it's written.

**Author's Note III: **To gidgetgirl – I think a story about Harmony and little Illyria would be fun to read. Maybe after the season finale the Senior Partners could punish Illyria by turning her into a child and make Harmony take care of her. I'd get a kick out of Harmony and little Illyria saving the world. Maybe someone could throw a challenge together.

* * *

**Chapter 14.**

**_An aeroplane, somewhere in the sky, the next evening._**

Illyria groaned as her stomach lurched and it's contents spewed forth into the paper bag Willow had given her.

"It's not fair!" The pint-sized deity moaned, glaring at Fred, who was half asleep in Wesley's arms. "If I am sick, Winifred should be sick too. Why isn't she?"

"Because she didn't refuse to take the travel sickness tablets we gave her, insisting that we were trying to poison her." Wesley pointed out dryly.

"Are you sure that you don't want to reconsider?" Willow asked temptingly, holding out the pink, teddy bear shaped tablet.

Deciding that putting an end to the unpleasant experience of vomiting was worth a small sacrifice of pride, little Illyria grudgingly accepted the tablet, popping it into her mouth eagerly.

"Mmm." Her eyes lit up with genuine childlike enthusiasm. "Strawberry."

* * *

**_An hour later._**

"Did we have to bring the cat?" Angel groused for the umpteenth time, glaring at Wanker, who was happily occupying his time by sharpening his claws – much to the detriment of the seat he was using as a scratching post.

"Yes." Little Fred's tone brooked no argument. "If we'd left Wanker at the office, he'd have been lonely."

"I could have lived with th . . . No! Bad cat! Bad!"

Wanker looked up at the vampire with an innocent 'who, me?' expression, not at all self conscious or ashamed about the yellow puddle he had 'improved' the carpet of the plane with.

"Don't yell at Wanker!" Fred exclaimed, scooping her insulted pet into her arms. "It's not his fault he has accidents. He's just a baby. 'Sides," The four year old pointed out logically. "There's no litter tray on the plane."

"Sorry, sweetheart." Angel smiled at the little girl. I'm not really mad at Wanker. It's just . . ."

"You're scared." Fred finished for him. "That something will go wrong with the spell." She gave him a sunny smile. "Don't be. You have to have happily ever after in fairytales. That's the rule."

"We can't argue with that." Wesley spoke with more optimism than he felt.

"It'll work." Willow said in a low voice.

Wesley gave her a wan smile, his eyes never leaving little Fred. "I hope so."

_/I can't lose her again. /_

* * *

**_Half an hour later._**

"Are we there yet?"

"Not yet, Fred."

"Are we there yet?"

"Illyria, didn't you hear me tell Fred . . ."

"Are we there yet?"

"Fred, you just asked me!"

"That was nearly ten seconds ago. We've moved since then. Are we there yet?"

"Not . . ."

"Are we there yet?"

"Girls!" Gunn glared at the two angelic looking little girls. "I will tell you when we get there." He glared at the smirking and decidedly _un_angelic looking Spike. "You just _had_ to teach them that game, didn't you?"

The blond vampire grinned impudently. "Are we there yet?"

* * *

**_Two and a half hours later, the Deeper Well._**

"Is this it?" Fred wrinkled her nose at the knarled tree trunk.

"This is it." For her sake, Wesley tried to sound cheerful.

"Oh." Fred frowned. "I thought it'd be a castle."

"It is the Deeper Well."

After her first glimpse of the tall, robed figure carrying a lit flame torch, Fred ducked behind Wesley's leg, shyly avoiding the newcomer.

Illyria, on the other hand, met Drogyn's gaze fearlessly.

"My jailer."

"Old one." Drogyn inclined his head slightly. "You have returned. Of your own will?"

"Yes." Illyria glared at him. "This world was not what I expected, not what I wanted. I expect that situation to be rectified before I return."

"Alright, let's get this show on the road." Willow interrupted. "My spell needs to take place at midnight if it's to work. And I'm sure Illyria's dying to get back to the Deeper Well."

The little goddess nodded eagerly.

"Very well." With a wave of his hand, Drogyn opened the gateway to the Deeper Well, the tomb and prison of countless old ones.

Moving in single file, little Illyria, Angel, Gunn, Lorne, Spike, Willow and Faith followed Drogyn through the doorway.

"Wesley," Little Fred's voice was soft. "I'm scared."

Wesley scooped her up in his arms, rubbing her back gently. "We don't have to do this if you don't want to."

"No." She shook her head decisively. "We have to try." She looked up at him with beseeching eyes. "Will you stay with me?"

He kissed the top of her head. "I'll be right there."

* * *

"The ritual will take only moments." Drogyn spoke quietly, but confidently as he scattered some kind of sand over a brazier. "If you are ready. . ."

"I am." Illyria stood next to the flaming brazier.

"Me too." Although she did not sound anywhere near as self-assured as her counterpart, little Fred didn't falter as she took her place next to Illyria.

Drogyn took a deep breath, concentrating all of his energies on his right hand where a purplish crystal Wesley recognized as having come from Illyria's sarcophagus was slowly forming.

The Guardian of the Deeper Well chanted in a strange language not even Wesley recognized, the flames of the brazier licking higher and higher as he spoke the ritual words.

His pupils were jet black as he turned towards the six adults.

"I advise you to step away." His tone was fierce.

They hastened to obey.

Finishing his incantation, Drogyn stepped as far away from the brazier as he dared and, hefting the crystal in his hand, dashed it into the flames.

The force of the blast was enough to knock him off his feet, although the two little girls stood unmoving in it's wake.

The dark cave was completely illuminated by the blue flames, which increased in intensity until the seven adults had to shield their eyes to avoid being blinded.

A scream of pain and triumph echoed through the cave, growing louder and louder as it resonated through the chamber and all the way through the earth to the other side, announcing to the slumbering, trapped demons that one of their fold was returning.

Then, as quickly as it happened, it was over.

"Fred!" Wesley darted forward to catch the prone body of the woman he loved in his arms. "She's as cold as ice!" He desperately checked for breathing and a pulse, any sign of life. "She's dead." Even though he had been preparing himself for this since he had heard Willow's plan, no, since he had learned that Illyria had infected his beloved – had it really only been a week ago? – the pain he felt saying this was greater than any he had ever felt.

"Get out of my way, Wesley."

Willow knelt next to the other woman's corpse, her eyes turning a liquid black as her spell called forth the most forbidden of magicks, calling on the powers that governed the universe to, for once, cut them a break.

"It's not working." Icy tears rolled down Angel's cheeks as the spell progressed with no sign of progress.

From his arms, Wanker mewed unhappily, not understanding what was happening.

Scarcely noticing what he was doing, Angel stroked the kitten's fur, wanting to offer some comfort to the distressed animal.

"Give her time." Spike insisted. "She's done this before. Once."

Wesley watched, too numb to cry or speak as the red haired witch expended every ounce of energy she possessed in a last, desperate shot at reviving her friend.

"It's too late." His voice was hoarse. "She's gone."

Willow looked up at him, her dark eyes a sparkling white, her expression one of gentleness and compassion.

Her skin shimmered as she gently placed her hands on Fred's forehead and over her heart.

An ethereally beautiful song filled the confines of the cave, bringing tears not only to Lorne's eyes, but to the eyes of everyone who heard it.

The being he knew was not Willow looked up at Wesley with an expression of pure empathy and love.

_/You have been given a gift in your love. / _The sweet voice resonated through his head. _/Do not give up on it. Ever. /_

Willow's eyes returned to their normal shade as the force possessing her departed. Exhausted, she lay on the floor of the cave, breathing heavily.__

"Wesley?" Fred's choking call was the most beautiful thing he had ever heard.

"I'm here, my love." Gently pulling her into his arms, Wesley leaned forward, kissing her gently. "I'll always be here."

"I told you . . ." Fred's breathing was laboured. "I told you we'd get 'happily ever after'."

THE END.

_Author's Note: Well, that's all folks. Please forgive the corny ending. After what happened on the show, I couldn't bear not to have a happy ending. I hope you liked it._


End file.
